53 thoughts on “Jersey Girl”

  1. No way its even close…Kevins best movie was in black and white.

    #1 | Comment by bligityblah — January 16, 2004 @ 8:10 pm

  2. Poor Kevin Smith. He has to try and get people to see a movie starring Beniffer after Gigli. Oh well, guess that’s what you get for casting Jenny from the Block.

    #2 | Comment by Anonymous Bastard — January 16, 2004 @ 8:15 pm

  3. Gods! Not even if Liv spent the movie in full bondage garb would I see that.

    #3 | Comment by RobertBruce — January 16, 2004 @ 8:37 pm

  4. Clerks was excellent indeed. But Chasing Amy was definitely Smith’s "best" movie.

    #4 | Comment by Amy — January 16, 2004 @ 8:53 pm

  5. pffffft, mallrats owned all.

    #5 | Comment by Charles — January 16, 2004 @ 8:56 pm

  6. Well maybe I’m sappy or into Joey Lauren Adams (is that her name??) but I thought Chasing Amy was the best of the batch. Clerks was incoherent snippets. Altho props to Jason Biggs/James Van der Beek scene. That was great

    #6 | Comment by lsleelee — January 16, 2004 @ 9:09 pm

  7. Who gives a crap. Kevin Smith while an interesting character, and entertaining writer, is an awful story teller and a worse director. Face it. Clerks, was mildly entertaining mainly because it didn’t completely suck like most indy flicks, but wasn’t anything to write home about by any stretch. Mallrats was a dissappointing attempt, and quite frankly this sort of movie should be best left to pros like Amy Heckerling, who actually know how to combine social commentary with comedy. Chasing Amy has lesbians. And if you’re really honest with yourself, you’ll have to admit that THAT was the only thing that was remotely interesting about it. Then again, does it really need anything else. I guess not, but I digress. Dogma, should have really been call Dogshiat. And Jay and Silent Bob strike back was a waste of celluloid. Big time. None of these fucking 3rd rate home videos would ever get made if it weren’t for his buddies Ben Affleck, and Matt Damon showing up in them.

    About the only good thing I can say about it is, that they are good enough friends for continually having their already fragile careers taking it up the ass out of gratitude for their long time buddy Smith. However, when the fuck is enough, enough?

    #7 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 16, 2004 @ 9:11 pm

  8. To clarify, the last statement has nothing to do with the Clerks statement, I know that scene isn’t in that movie. It was about the "Which movie is best" debate. My bad.

    #8 | Comment by lsleelee — January 16, 2004 @ 9:14 pm

  9. Clerks, Mallrats, and Chasing Amy are excellent movies any way you cut it. The random flow of Clerks is a character trait, not a flaw like weazel would have you believe. The most recent KS movies have been entertaining but they don’t compare to the first 3 by any stretch of the imagination. I’m sorry you just don’t get the humor weazel, just stick to your movies where stuff go boom and your See n’ Says.

    By the way, Kevin Smith used Ben before he was famous.

    #9 | Comment by bligityblah — January 16, 2004 @ 11:05 pm

  10. Chasing Amy licked balls. I was thouroughly entertained by everything else he’s done.

    #10 | Comment by somedude — January 16, 2004 @ 11:46 pm

  11. Jersey Girl was filmed WAY before Gigli. And to answer y’all’s questions, the film sucks ass. Unless you like sappy girly movies. I went to a screening of it about eight months ago.

    #11 | Comment by Deezpunx — January 17, 2004 @ 1:56 am

  12. I think I’d like to see more of the Bligityblah-sexcrazedweazel feud develop–it’s probably more entertaining than this movie.

    #12 | Comment by Jimbo — January 17, 2004 @ 2:20 am

  13. Just so you know I too am on my way up in the movie industry. I have written 4 books that have done moderately well. Recently some Hollywood big wigs have taken an interest in my ideas. Why should you believe me? Because I am some text on the internet and if you read it, it must be true.

    #13 | Comment by PorkChop — January 17, 2004 @ 4:13 am

  14. Clerks sucked. Ooo, he shot it in black and white, look how clever he is! Kevin Smith is one of those guys who can write scenes, not movies.

    Anyway, this looks ok. The Beniffer aspect doesn’t seem too involved, which is good, and there is always Liv Tyler if you get bored. It’ll be a while before its out in the UK I imagine..

    #14 | Comment by Jacob — January 17, 2004 @ 4:41 am

  15. Well at the moment sexcrazedweasel, I’d say Kevin’s movie career is going substantially better than yours and you have no real right to call him an "awful" storyteller.

    Oh and by the way I currently have 20th Century Fox and Paramount Pictures interested in a few scripts of mine. I don’t have any proof but trust me.

    #15 | Comment by randomhero — January 17, 2004 @ 9:34 am

  16. Gyahahahhaa! Silly humans. None of these films are any better or worse than the other. It is all opinion, my filthies.

    Whoa, my monitor is fucking dirty… I draw happy face on it! Hohohohoho!

    #16 | Comment by Bubba — January 17, 2004 @ 9:58 am

  17. According to Kevin he shot clerks in black and white because he’s cheap and at the time, broke. It has nothing to do with being clever, although it he is. Bunch of savages on this board. Weazel has every right to call KS an "awful" story teller, he just also has every right to be wrong.

    #17 | Comment by bligityblah — January 17, 2004 @ 10:48 am

  18. blig. Let’s not insult each other. You’re talking to someone that has been published many times over in print, and courted by several major studios in Hollywood to get my ideas put on the "big screen".

    I’m even repped by ICM.

    So trust me, I DO know what I’m talking about. I could go into structure, tone, and style, to support my arguments, but truth be told I have don’t feel like writing page long diatribes for an audience of a couple dozen people.

    Sure. You’re going to say that anyone on the net could claim to be anyone they want to be. Where is my "proof"? Well, there isn’t going to be one. Take it or leave it. All I can say is that I’m not lying, but if you prefer to call me a moron, as you’ve done many a time before, feel free.

    Afterall, this way its more fun.

    Oh. And I have met Kevin Smith on several occasions, and I think he’s a great guy. That doesn’t change my opinion of his movies.

    #18 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 17, 2004 @ 12:11 pm

  19. Oh. Just a couple of points to note.

    I think I get the "humor" in clerks, but I don’t happen to think its particularly funny, or endearing. I think since you could consider clerks to be a cult favorite, I’m most likely in the majority with this opinion. Also, it’s not the "random flow" that bothered me about Clerks, rather that it wasn’t terribly entertaining on any particular level.

    #19 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 17, 2004 @ 12:29 pm

  20. I know it’s off topic, but there are 91 "pedophiles" online right now.

    Damn.

    #20 | Comment by Alexhawker — January 17, 2004 @ 12:30 pm

  21. "Bunch of savages on this board"….LOL, now that was funny bligityblah, and your opinion is right on my friend! I did read that he was broke, and that black and white was cheaper to make….So it had nothing to do with being clever, although it really was!

    I don’t care what sexcrazedweazel has to say about Smith, that is is opinion, and I do respect that… However my opinion is that Smith is a great story teller, and not to mention not a bad actor as well. Oh did I mention…His wife is way hot!!

    Yes I will go and check out the new flick, with or without anyone else.

    #21 | Comment by KJS — January 17, 2004 @ 1:22 pm

  22. I’m really God in disguise, so I think you should all just bow down before my opinion.

    Of course, I don’t have any proof to back up my statement whatsoever, so you could just call me a moron like you always do.

    Afterall, my last lines are always pathetic, non-sensical attempts at knowing better.

    You’ve yet to prove that your IQ could be measured in positive numbers, Badazz2002.

    ‘Till then, just shut the fuck up.

    #22 | Comment by Kingolf — January 17, 2004 @ 1:46 pm

  23. "That’s what the Internet’s for: slandering others anonymously"

    That quote has never been more true. Justin, it’s pretty late but thanks for the plug man.

    #23 | Comment by Zim — January 17, 2004 @ 2:25 pm

  24. Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news Kingolf. All IQ, my retarded little minx, is measured in positive numbers. I’m quite certain this is known even in darkest reaches of Denmark.

    #24 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 17, 2004 @ 8:10 pm

  25. Why are healthy discussions always misconstrued as "feuds"? There is a big difference between arguing and fighting. By the way, am I the only one here that has ever called the QuickStop from Clerks?

    #25 | Comment by bligityblah — January 17, 2004 @ 8:31 pm

  26. You mean the Quikstop from Clerks.

    #26 | Comment by Morgan — January 17, 2004 @ 11:37 pm

  27. Actually is is Quickstop Morgan, go watch Clerks, Chasing Amy or Jay and Bob Strike Back.

    #27 | Comment by randomhero — January 17, 2004 @ 11:40 pm

  28. If there was any justice in the world, I’d have millions of dollars and naked women, and you would all be my slaves.

    #28 | Comment by Scott Wills — January 18, 2004 @ 2:06 am

  29. this movie looks like it’ll be total crap. VERY typical. however i thought chasing amy was quite good (lesbian action, talk of fisting, bit of humor, cute guy = good movie).

    maybe i have low standards.

    #29 | Comment by sarah — January 18, 2004 @ 2:20 am

  30. sexcrazedweazel, can i be in your next movie, once the studio’s are done ‘courting’ you and actually use your ideas??

    Please?

    i’m an awesome actress.

    I am not lying. Trust me, i know what i am talking about.

    #30 | Comment by Sarah — January 18, 2004 @ 2:23 am

  31. Can I be in your movie too? I am also an excellent actor and deserve to be working in the industry.

    #31 | Comment by Scott Wills — January 18, 2004 @ 3:32 am

  32. Arguing on the internet is competing at the Special Olympics. Win or lose, you are still retarded.

    #32 | Comment by kvl — January 18, 2004 @ 11:12 am

  33. I think I’d rather stare at the happy face drawn into the dust on Bubba’s monitor for two hours than to go see "Jersey Girl" … yup.

    #33 | Comment by JustSumDude — January 18, 2004 @ 11:43 am

  34. Well, sexcrazedweasel I actually have appeared in a few movies, nothing huge but check them out at:

    http://www.scottwills.4t.com

    #34 | Comment by Scott Wills — January 18, 2004 @ 6:26 pm

  35. Not only was this a shitty ass post, but it’s taking Justin forever to come up with another post. Maybe he should find some pics of that chick devon aoki from 2 fast 2 furious she is damn fine.

    #35 | Comment by The Dark One — January 18, 2004 @ 7:26 pm

  36. I second that last part!

    #36 | Comment by bligityblah — January 18, 2004 @ 8:53 pm

  37. eh…I’ll go see it.

    #37 | Comment by Will — January 18, 2004 @ 9:17 pm

  38. jersey girl may not suck cause J-Lo gets killed. That will be good for a laugh. And plus it can’t be as bad as Gigli….nothing can be.

    #38 | Comment by kvl — January 18, 2004 @ 9:38 pm

  39. Also just to clarify things I am also a highly decorated Navy Seal and the military is going to send me into space to start the first Space Navy Seal academy. They will shoot us out of cannons at China and we will Navy Seal them so hard. Now that you know this you can trust me when I say that you are all filthy liars. Oh yeah I was the guy that found Saddam.

    #39 | Comment by PorkChop — January 18, 2004 @ 10:15 pm

  40. Gigli was an awesome movie! Really. You should watch it for its artistic value. The chemistry between J-lo and Ben Affleck was sizzling. The movie was misunderstood as most of the greatest flicks generally have been. I saw it twice. As for my qualifications, which seem to be needed to post now, I am an ex-marine special forces, the most recent lover of H.R.C. and the current president of China.

    #40 | Comment by Joe — January 19, 2004 @ 1:04 am

  41. You sir are a buffoon! Devon Aoki looks like a 12 year old boy with a touch of the downs. She is a model because people find her interestingly ugly like alot of the current runway models. Your want of putting your penis in 12 yearold down syndrome kids is your own business so please keep it that way. I know this because I am Carson Daly and I am the behind Tito’s rise to power in post WW2 Yugoslavia. Boo YAH!

    #41 | Comment by PorkChop — January 19, 2004 @ 2:15 am

  42. I’d like to meet this 12 year old "boy".

    http://devonaoki.free.fr/fashion/vibe/vibe.jpg
    http://www.famousbabes.com/pics118/devonA/devonA125.jpg
    http://www.famousbabes.com/pics118/devonA/devonA064.jpg

    http://www.iamtrouble.com/Femme_Fatale_Masuimi_Max.htm

    Is pretty cool… and seems to be her real name.

    #42 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 19, 2004 @ 3:51 am

  43. Kevin Smith’s best work was by far the Clerks Cartoon series. Man, anybody who saw that knows exactly what i’m talking about…pure genius.

    Dazed and Confused was pretty good too

    #43 | Comment by BillyBob — January 19, 2004 @ 4:31 am

  44. BillyBob / anyone

    care to explain the connection between Dazed and Confused and Kevin Smith?

    #44 | Comment by NGEddie — January 19, 2004 @ 5:51 am

  45. Clerks was good. Mallrats…..eeehhhh…it had its moments. Chasing Amy was great until the stupid suggestion of group sex. Dogma was awesome. Great castingn and subject matter. Jay & SB, was very tepid. One big inside joke. I’m worried about Bennifer being in this movie.

    #45 | Comment by grud — January 19, 2004 @ 9:31 am

  46. Seriously pork chop, i didnt know 12 year old boys had vaginas. I myself am a fan of japanese chicks they have this sexy look to them. Also maybe i think she is hot cause she isnt the typical fake boob hollywood bitch up in all the playboy magazines. im getting so sick of fake boobs, any girl can look good when they put money into their body. if you think she looks like a 12 year old boy you need to get some fuckin glasses!

    #46 | Comment by The Dark One — January 19, 2004 @ 1:44 pm

  47. http://revulsion.net/galleries/bin/view.php?image=Devon_Aoki/2F2F_17.jpg&bg=5f5f5f
    Now thats a 12 year old boy i bang all night long.

    #47 | Comment by The Dark One — January 19, 2004 @ 6:40 pm

  48. Since when does a 12 yearold boy need a vagina for someone to want to stick their penis in them?

    I don’t doubt that I need my vision corrected. My contacts are going bad on me. Devon is actually half Japanese. I would like to point out though that with enough make up you can make anyone attractive, even 12 year old retarded kids.

    The last link SCW posted is not Devon. You can tell because that model has boobs.

    #48 | Comment by PorkChop — January 19, 2004 @ 7:04 pm

  49. the last one was of "masuimi max" – ie. my reference to the "…seems to be her real name", and actually separating that link from the others.

    #49 | Comment by sexcrazedweazel — January 19, 2004 @ 7:15 pm

  50. I know this is (just a little!) off subject, but I just wanted to say that I got my tongue pierced a few days ago, and it hurts like a bitch to chew food. =( It’s worse than the time I got braces about 6 years back.

    #50 | Comment by Becca — January 19, 2004 @ 7:56 pm

  51. i just dont see the "12 year old boy" resemblence in devon aoki. maybe some people dont find her atractive but she certainly doesnt look like a 12 year old boy.

    #51 | Comment by The Dark One — January 19, 2004 @ 9:37 pm

  52. whoa!! i just googled this chick (devon aoki) and she’s fucking ugly!!!

    #52 | Comment by sarah — January 20, 2004 @ 2:30 am

  53. oh man lay off my girl DA, she’s a cutie. She’s got that exotic look to her! Damn fine!

    #53 | Comment by BillyBob — January 21, 2004 @ 8:21 pm

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