Question: What’s the difference between Jessica Alba, Eva Mendes and Eva Longoria?

Answer: I wouldn’t do Jessica Alba.

Although i did masturbate to her nipple the other day*. So maybe that counts for something.

*(this may or may not have actually happened)

I downloaded Fantastic Four last night. I was expecting the movie to suck. But lo and behold, it’s actually a pretty fun movie. I thought Chris Evans was great as the Human Torch. He totally had all the best lines. Michael Chiklis also did an awesome job playing The Thing. I actually felt sad for his character a coupla times. And what the fuck is up with his wife? That bitch is COLD.

Oh and if you’re wondering about Jessica Alba’s bra and panties scene, this is all there is to it.

Apparently the movie made quite A LOT of money over the weekend. More than anybody even expected. They had it pegged at around 30 mil but it ended up making like 56 or something. Not bad.

Also saw War Of The Worlds on DVD the other day. I was actually surprised at how hard it pushed its PG-13 rating. Almost seemed like a borderline R to me at times. When i first saw the aliens turn those running humans into dust, i was like “whoa”. Pretty thrilling stuff. I had chills running down my spine. Did anybody notice the numerous references to 9/11 and the war on terrorism? The downed plane, the Twin Tower-less shot of the horizon, the ash covered people, the mentioning of terrorists, Tim Robbins talking about how occupancies always fail etc. Maybe it’s just me. But i thought it all made up for the lack of plot. It definitely made me think. Anyhow, it was good to see Dakota Fanning in yet another movie. That girl should be in all movies. Best child actor of this generation i say. I heart Dakota Fanning.

I guess the next movie i’m looking forward to seeing is The Island. If only because it’s a Michael Bay flick and Scarlett Johansson’s in it. Other than that, the premise isn’t all that intriguing to me. But then again it might pull a Fantastic Four and hook me in after the fact. I saw Eight Legged Freaks for the first time the other day. Scarlett looked pretty yummy back then. Back during a time when she wasn’t banging greasy looking actors in elevators. Also saw her in The Horse Whisperer a while back. No comment*.

*(i’d’ve hit it even back then)

24 thoughts on “FLAME ON!

  1. Scarlett > Alba > Mendes > Longoria


    #1 | Comment by AngelBaby — July 13, 2005 @ 12:54 pm

  2. Looks like Bay told ScarJo to put her sweater gorillas back in their bra.


    Justin where are the Mariah Carey wardrobe malfunction shots?

    #2 | Comment by velocity girl — July 13, 2005 @ 1:35 pm

  3. Thanks a lot, Bay…you tool.

    What a fagay.

    #3 | Comment by AngelBaby — July 13, 2005 @ 2:24 pm

  4. Bay is the devil. The gay devil.

    #4 | Comment by J-Mah — July 13, 2005 @ 4:29 pm

  5. Bay Is as Gay as jumping Naked gnomes shouting yay! On christmas Day!!


    #5 | Comment by gulliver — July 13, 2005 @ 5:39 pm

  6. Michael Bay needs to die quickly.

    #6 | Comment by smash — July 13, 2005 @ 6:15 pm

  7. saw a preview for The Island on HBO. Lots of car chases and people running around. Reminded me of a Minority Report except with less style and more people in white jumpsuits. It looks like they use the Lexus concept from MR as well.

    #7 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — July 13, 2005 @ 11:43 pm

  8. From the promo shots I’ve seen of The Island, expect Scarlett in tight pants.


    #8 | Comment by heineken — July 14, 2005 @ 1:17 am

  9. From the promo shots I’ve seen of The Island, expect me to be a little tight in the pants.


    #9 | Comment by Justin — July 14, 2005 @ 1:54 am

  10. Ugh craptastic 4 was so boring. It didn’t hold my interest until the final 10 minutes. All of the characters were insanely dull, except for Torch. The thing looked like a giant piece of shit. I wasn’t aware that rock could wrinkle when you move your neck.

    #10 | Comment by radish01001 — July 14, 2005 @ 1:58 am

  11. Justin gets his panties in a bunch over ScarJo.

    #11 | Comment by smash — July 14, 2005 @ 2:04 am

  12. Justin you had to watch NBC last night. Dakota Fanning was on Jay Leno and Scar Jo on Conan.

    #12 | Comment by nxvxn — July 14, 2005 @ 2:43 am

  13. no J-Alb huh? I’ll take her and Scar Jo to go please.

    #13 | Comment by TheChef — July 14, 2005 @ 3:10 am

  14. Boo to Bay. Titanic was PG-13 and it had boobs. Not fair. Scar Jo should’ve gotten naked.

    #14 | Comment by JessicaChobotSucks — July 14, 2005 @ 5:51 am

  15. can’t wait to see what Bay does with a live action Transformers movie. Do people actually care about robots in disguise these days?

    The only 2 Bay movies I like are The Rock and Bad Boys, in that order.

    #15 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — July 14, 2005 @ 5:55 am

  16. I can’t believe you saw an actual message in War of the Worlds

    #16 | Comment by Vector — July 14, 2005 @ 6:56 am

  17. First, even theough she’s not a very good actress Jessica Alba > Eva Mendes. The ratings should go like this:
    Scar Jo >> Alba > Eva Longoria > Eva Mendes

    Second, Dakota Fanning helped ruin War of the Worlds. The only thing she does throughout the entire movie is scream and act like she’s smarter than everyone else. Besides that, the ending of WotW was stupid.

    Semi spoiler alert

    Why did a certain main character who should have died have to come back unharmed at the end? Also, why is the rich neighborhood in Boston the only area that looks good as new?

    Third, I join the Michael-Bay-is-gay-for-not- letting-Scar-Jo-show-her-boobs club.

    #17 | Comment by Elder Young — July 14, 2005 @ 7:00 am

  18. Alba>ScarJo>Mendes>Longoria>>>>>>>>>…>>>>Justin

    #18 | Comment by kiko — July 14, 2005 @ 8:33 am

  19. Come on Justin, admit it! Given a chance, you would so hit Jessica Alba. I mean, you claim not to like her, and yet you keep posting her pics – which is good, cause I like her.

    If you don’t want her, I’ll be happy to take her, you know.

    Sign me up for the Michael Bay is a gigant flaming homo club. 🙁

    #19 | Comment by Luke — July 14, 2005 @ 8:39 am

  20. Chris Evans > Jessica Alba.

    #20 | Comment by Dex — July 14, 2005 @ 9:21 am

  21. A gigant flaming homo?

    #21 | Comment by JustSumDude — July 14, 2005 @ 9:21 am

  22. Er… I think I meant gigantic… As in, you know – very, very flaming homo…

    Um… Well, it sounded ok in my head when I was typing it… 😛

    #22 | Comment by Luke — July 14, 2005 @ 10:24 am

  23. ps: i also saw the live action initial d movie the other day. what a piece of shit. a piece of shit that totally broke box office records in asia apparently. only initial d fanboys will like this movie. i thought it was boring as fuck.

    #23 | Comment by Justin — July 14, 2005 @ 4:57 pm

  24. it was pretty stupid, but i never watched the anime or read the comics so i cant compare it to anything. it had its funny moments with the dumbass from infernal affairs though.

    #24 | Comment by william — July 14, 2005 @ 8:24 pm

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