Nelly Furtado is the ultimate example of a white artist jacking black music and watering it down for white folks. I hate Nelly Furtado.

Nelly’s music is poor. That’s all you really need to know. And, she’s big-headed about it, which makes it even worse.

What about her insufferably nasal voice? It’s quite a funny thing. Almost as obnoxious is her arrogance (at least what I find in her interviews). She talks about how she will do anything the hell she wants on her second album. Now that Timbaland is remixing her and whatnot, does it really make a difference?

Nelly Furtado’s music is kind of like the way she comes across when you see her. It’s trying to be something but it’s not really anything. She has the ability to appear smart, because she takes herself quite seriously, but she’s a dunce. Her music’s just like that: dopey yet pro. Boring. And she looks like she’s going bald when she puts the corn rows in. Nelly, if you google this, stop pulling your hair. You’re going bald, just like the chick on Real World. As a matter of fact, Nelly could easily be the chick on the Real World (the balding long-haired brunette that wants to be a singer). If you don’t know what I mean, check out the top of her head next time the show’s on.

13 thoughts on “I HAET JOOO!

  1. here’s a small rhyme for all u nelly haters…

    Nelly Smelly
    Smelly Nelly
    Nelly smells
    and so do you.

    hahaha jk.

    #1 | Comment by made — January 25, 2002 @ 5:39 am

  2. but dude, you like Enrique….

    #2 | Comment by scloop — January 25, 2002 @ 5:23 pm

  3. F@#* Nelly, you need some ‘phonics (stereophonics)… they kick ass. They’d kick nelly’s ass
    l8er 😉

    #3 | Comment by bubbles — January 25, 2002 @ 6:43 pm

  4. u r so damn right man..

    #4 | Comment by T-rotten — January 26, 2002 @ 6:39 am

  5. Justin – She ain’t arrogant. She sings both nasal and with open tones. She most certainly isn’t tryin’ to sound black (if she did, she failed – I don’t hear it – not sure where you’re getting that – if it’s her quasi-rapping: the Portuguese have had a rapping style for centuries). She’s definitely down to earth yet sure of herself – not arrogant. You’re entitled to your opinion, and mine is: You sound like an ignorant doofus -have you heard the album? It’s quite creative – I think it even won a Grammy – know what that is and who it is that votes?

    #5 | Comment by SIR — April 3, 2002 @ 4:38 am

  6. Justin –
    You’re a loser. Nelly is awesome. Just by the looks of her boobies, you can tell the girl has talent. Her coochie smells like daisies. Therefore she can dance as well. The only other artist ever that can compete with her is Danzig. They both rock. But "just because she rocks doesn’t mean she’s made of stone" – Mike Gagliano (adopted Jewish boy). She has feelings and if she ever read what you wrote, she would cry, then beat you up. You’re a meanie head and she’s a tough grrrrl. I think you need to stop masturbating, and start lisetening to her CD (with pants on!). By the way, your nipples are ugly.

    #6 | Comment by Heather — April 7, 2002 @ 6:26 pm

  7. its a little late for this but i just found your ignorant comments…have you even heard her album? do you know anything about her roots? her musical abilities? the fact that she was in a trip hop group and use to do vocals on hip hop tracks since she was 17, maybe earlier? her whole album (which she co-produced) combines trip hop, brazilian music, portuguese fado, hip hop, R&B and folk. jacking BLACK MUSIC? what is black music to you? you sound uneducated.

    #7 | Comment by jenn — August 30, 2002 @ 10:34 pm

  8. you are an ass*hole idiot

    #8 | Comment by Yo — September 10, 2002 @ 3:02 pm

  9. "Yo" are you talking to me?

    #9 | Comment by Jenn — September 20, 2002 @ 10:59 am

  10. I’m talking to you, and I’m telling you to shut up. Only because I hate you and the flying monkey people. Curse those monkey people…

    #10 | Comment by Wang Chang — March 23, 2003 @ 12:41 pm

  11. I’m talking to you, and I’m telling you to shut up. Only because I hate you and the flying monkey people. Curse those monkey people…

    #11 | Comment by Wang Chang — March 23, 2003 @ 12:42 pm

  12. anyone who likes nelly furtado is deaf, a dunce or both(probably inbred) – there’s always some brainless muppet jumping to the defence of scrawny little halfwits like the furtado with inane stories of how the used to be this or that (yawn) the rest of us can just live in hope that she disapears or shuts the fcuk up in the very near future!

    #12 | Comment by count_funkula — February 11, 2004 @ 5:35 pm

  13. Nelly really sucks. Her face is all pear-shaped and her laughs are artificial. everytime I see her in an interview, she talks so smart-assed and arrogant, it really makes me hate her.
    Nelly, I dunno whose dicks you blew or how much scum you swallowed to get so far with such little talent, but I bet loads….

    #13 | Comment by caroline — February 16, 2008 @ 7:23 pm

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