WHAT THE WHAT

14 08 2012

Remember that post about Hayden Panettiere and how fucked up she allegedly is? Well, it seems par for the course for most of these Hollywood starlets apparently. I stumbled across this crazy story about Miley Cyrus.

Now, this is probably the best Miley Cyrus fan fiction i’ve ever read or one of the most fucked up true stories ever.

I actually got a boner reading it.

Several years ago, I was working at an accounting firm doing financial statement audits in L.A. Pretty good experience but boring work for the most part. After a couple years of doing this, and seeing the ins and outs of Hollywood, I began to see where there was real money to be made. In my audits, I saw the the bank that the TV execs and producers were making. True, they worked very long hours, but I did have occasion to meet with them, and it definitely did not seem to be rocket science. Only years later did I find out why they spent so many hours at the office.

I left the accounting firm and went back to school to become a television producer, so I too could earn a fortune doing seemingly easy work. I teamed up with another newcomer to the field, and we began looking for a good opportunity to produce something that would give us our start. After a few months, some writers we met with a few times came to us with a script about a hillbilly girl that doubles as a rock star. Seemed like a sh!tty plot to me, but my agent urged me it had promise, so I pursued it.

We began the casting process. Pretty mediocre talent the first 10 or so through, and I was beginning to think we were going to have to go with sh!tty talent to go along with a sh!tty script, and this thing was sure to fail.

The next girl comes through the door, and I immediately sat up a bit. Young, but undeniably cute with star appeal. But also with an appearance of innocence. All things that fit the role. Behind her stands her father, who I immediately recognized as an ex-music star. “Take real good care of my daughter, you hear,” he says, and walks out the door.

She reads her lines, and I immediately feel this could possibly be the girl that is chosen, but I was not certain. The lines weren’t quite perfect, but something was there, for sure. Then I thought, she needs to get further into the role for me to be certain. So I gave her the blonde wig that would be used in her rock star role. She reread the lines, and I don’t know if this girl was bi-polar, schizophrenic or just bat sh!t crazy but the second she put that wig on she changed. Now, not only did she have star appeal and an innocence about her, she had flat out sex appeal. She read her lines to perfection, with a sex appeal I knew the camera would love.

After she finished her lines, she walked slowly and seductively toward me. “Is that how you like it?” she asked, while gazing upward into my eyes. I responded, a bit uncomfortably, “Yeah, yeah that was great. Perfect, actually.”

“Great,” she said. “I guess there’s probably only one thing left, huh?” she said. She reached out and grabbed the button of my pants. I was initially stunned, and couldn’t react quick enough to stop her. “Wha . . wait,” I began to say, but by that time my button was undone and my zipper was down. I was just about to put a complete stop to it, when her father burst in.

“Oh, I see she passed the line reading,” he says, with a grin on his face. I thought he was going to kill me or threaten to sue me, but no, he seems to be laughing about this. But I still had my scruples, so I said, “I don’t know what’s going on, but this is ending right here.” Her father immmediately changed his tone, and ran at me and threw me up against the wall. “Look here, boy. You better not disrespect my daughter and make her think she’s not pretty enough to have a guy stick his dick in her mouth when she flat out put it out there for him. You can give us this part or not, but this is going to happen.”

Apparently, he was experienced enough in how this business operates from his entertainment past, and groomed his daughter to fit the mold. And also apparently, he thought I was experienced enough in the game to know these sordid rules. Little did he know I had no idea what was going on. I frantically raced for a way out in my mind, but all I could think of was that I could definitely make a good argument that I was forced into this, and probably had the bruise marks on my arms and neck from the father to prove it. So I let things proceed.

She took off her shirt and cupped her developing but flawless breasts in her hands and slowly wrapped her tiny lips around half of my cock. While she was working her mouth down on it steadily, she was definitely struggling. Her full lips strained to fit around the shaft. When she finally swallowed the entire length, she groaned from her chest and bobbed slightly.

As young as she was, she never forgot to look up and keep eye-contact with me even as her hands slid down from her own tits and under her skirt to quickly drag a small white thong down and off.

I started the day think I was the big confident producer casting these young probably scared sh!tless girls, and here I am feeling like a shy, uncertin virgin. This girl took complete control of the situation.

I was getting close to cumming and thought this would put a quick end to things. But right at that moment she took my throbbing cock out of her mouth.

Yep, she knew exactly what she was doing. She ditched her skirt then scooted onto the bed on her back and spread her legs. She was either naturally bare or was shaved completely bare. Her tiny glistening sex was a perfectly smooth and pink invitation. Seconds ago wanting this to be over, I paused only long enough to finish getting my pants off and quickly slid on top of her.

I eased into her, I still wasn’t able to be forceful in this situation yet. She shifted and pulled her legs up very high, limberly hooking them over my shoulders. Yep, flexible and eager. Damn youth.

For the next half hour, her father watched me make love to his daughter. She shivered through three separate and very satisfying-looking orgasms before I groaned with my own release. I assumed this was finally over, but by this point, I was beginning to not want for that so much.

But we weren’t done.

After a few minutes of catching our breath, she slipped herself off the bed and began agressively sucking on my cock again. She stroked it like a pro at the same time as violently sucking on it. This appeared to be some cue for her dad. He began to walk over, unbuttoning his pants. She raised her backside, turned, and bent herself forward at the waist with her upper body on the bed. She swished her little bubble butt temptingly.

“C’mere daddy, I don’t think he’s ready for this other hole.”

My eyes slowly widened.

Her dad did not hesitate. He simply stood and moved behind her and then gave her just what she asked for, pressing himself into her ass with no more than a nod. She whimpered at the invasion but didn’t move away. Worst of all, the bastard was good at it, judging from the very happy groans she made over the next ten minutes while at the same time sucking at my throbbing rod wildly. I’m certain from how comfortable they both were with this, that it was not the first time it happened.

We all came at roughly the same time, and I sheepishly and quickly got dressed, as my mind was now racing with how weird this whole thing had gotten. I said thank you and that we’d be in touch. Of course she got the part and became a big star.

But I could not live with what had been done. Perhaps this was commonplace in the business, but it was never going to be acceptable to me. I quit my job within a month, and everyone had to wonder why, seeing as I had just scored a big deal with this new show for a big cable channel.

Every time I turn on reruns and see the scenes where she puts on the blonde wig, I know the girl that she is changing into. I can see it in her eyes and hear it in the lines she reads. It sickens me and I am disgusted by the world that lets this happen. But I also almost always end up in front of my television set, with my cock covered in vaseline, trying the replicate the feeling that she gave me that day.

– (Source)

ANYWAY, i should note that the source site of the Hayden story turned out to be full of lies but it’s hard to deny that things like these DON’T happen in Hollywood. I’ve read some crazy casting couch stories involving Nickelodeon chicks and this Dan Schneider producer guy. Like how he got Amanda Bynes knocked up (leading to an abortion) and how he’s the real father of Jamie Lynn Spear’s kid, amongst other things.

Googling him brings up:

Despite CDAN having some made up stories, it’s the (allegedly) true ones that really stand out. Especially when there’s proof behind them.

Like in this story about Amanda Bynes that was posted in the comments section of the Hayden post (#36)

Ever wonder what happens when you put a former B+ female tweener who gets her own first show and you mix her with a former B list television actress from a long running hit ensemble show who also thinks she is the star? You get several years of pleasantness on the outside and the worst conditions ever on a show on the inside. The former tweener had a huge ego. Coming off some movies and a very popular tween show she thought she was going to be the biggest star on the planet. She also had a very goody goody image on the outside, but on multiple occasions had more than one guy at once. She is also a huge collector of her own homemade porn.

The actress coming into the show who had been on the hit ensemble show also was a goody goody on the inside and out but it did not stop her from being a diva. She also could be the biggest b**ch on the planet if you crossed her. As she told the tweener once after they got into a hair pulling fight, “I learned from the meanest actress who ever walked onto a television set. You will lose.”

How about the times that our tweener would walk around naked when the actresses husband would stop by the set. “Oops. I did not know you were here.” Not that she would ever normally have sex with him. She likes big, big big guys if you know what I mean. However, to get back at the actress she would have slept with the husband who is also a B list movie actor.

For years the two never spoke to each other unless they had to. Knowing how prudish the actress was, our tweener would have wild sex as loudly and as close to the actress as possible even when her kids were visiting. She would even have sex in the actresses’ trailer and have her companions leave their used condoms. It was a wild wild set and the two still hate each other.

Big, big big guys?

Lots more crazy stories in this thread over at the bodybuilding.com forums (???).

Worth a read if you have the time. Whether you believe them or not.


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50 responses to “WHAT THE WHAT”

    14 08 2012
  • 1.  RobCK (11:49:13) :

    wish it were true but I actually know someone that knows the cyrus clan and besides some money shit they are as boring and normal as any other family
    of course what happens behind closed doors no one truly knows and my friend certainly has no idea but she spent more than 3 years working as an assistant to the family coordinating minor shit like making sure everybody got to the same place at the same time of booking flights and never saw anything beyond normal shit

  • 14 08 2012
  • 2.  MacDaddy (12:35:45) :

    this is just way too long to read!

    Back to Katy Perry’s ass!

  • 14 08 2012
  • 3.  Fry (13:08:34) :

    Nope, not buying the Cyrus stuff. As fucked up as Hollywood might be sometimes, that didn’t happen.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 4.  Smiley (13:23:46) :

    That Cyrus stuff read like some half baked reject from the Penthouse Forum letters. But still a full pudge.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 5.  coolstream (13:45:50) :

    Abject lies, just like the last bullshit “story”…

    have some nifty http://sharenxs.com/view/?id=rsadnne-09122598-wp5i07x gif

  • 14 08 2012
  • 6.  AngelBaby (14:05:36) :

    cool story, bro.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 7.  Blumpkin (14:57:07) :

    “She ditched her skirt then scooted onto the bed on her back and spread her legs.”

    Why the fuck is there a bed in the room where he’s auditioning for a Disney Channel show? My suspension of disbelief has been completely ruined.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 8.  MacDaddy (16:53:09) :

    OK I finally had time to read this.

    While entertaining, this is complete BS.

    Nice Try though.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 9.  Pirho (18:35:22) :

    !st of all I can’t believe that Justin actually had the time to sit there and write even copy and paste) this shit, his wife must be out of town and his Chabot must be broken. This is 100% Fucking horse shit. Although I wish it were true.

  • 14 08 2012
  • 10.  coolstream (18:40:33) :

    What would happen if that Pepsi Girl and and the lazy town chick licked some piece of technology…

  • 14 08 2012
  • 11.  DisconcertedGeorge (19:33:44) :

    Unbelievable! This happened to me last week when I bumped into Miley Cyrus at the deli counter!

  • 14 08 2012
  • 12.  glitter (19:51:42) :

    my hands were shaking at

    “…and cupped her developing but flawless breasts in her hands and slowly wrapped her tiny lips around half of my…”

  • 14 08 2012
  • 13.  Rod Stiffington (21:35:11) :

    Good read, but I like the one about how Lacey Chabert landed her role on Party of Five by letting the producer rail her while Jennifer Love Hewitt sat on her face better. Schwing !!!!

  • 15 08 2012
  • 14.  Horatio (01:03:16) :

    Do the body building forums actually have anything to do with body building?

  • 15 08 2012
  • 15.  Jon (01:13:57) :

    You can tell right away that it’s fan fiction by how much detail they put into it, with specific dialogue and moment-to-moment descriptions of everything she does, like an author/narrator telling a story rather than a normal person sharing something that actually happened to them.

    But if you’re into that sort of thing, there are all sorts of stories like this all over the internet (starring young celebrities, people’s sisters and nieces, and other such pedobear adventures) all written in the same tone. They can be fun for people whose imaginations work better than porn.

  • 15 08 2012
  • 16.  Stew (01:16:35) :

    i actually saw miley once a couple years ago on the set of hanna montana and she looked normal this was before the tattoos and her celebrity status that she now has

  • 15 08 2012
  • 17.  glitter (07:54:47) :

    #13 tells the truth

  • 15 08 2012
  • 18.  harrykrishna (22:04:25) :

    #16..big deal…yaaaawwwn

  • 16 08 2012
  • 19.  Stew (02:16:06) :

    @ #18
    I’m not saying it was a cool story all I’m saying is I saw her in the studio that day and she looked just like any other girl her age, she was dressed in jeans with snickers and a black disney shirt
    still hot though but at the time I found her to be too young

  • 16 08 2012
  • 20.  bikar (08:45:36) :

    “but at the time I found her to be too young”

    Dude…look around you. : )

  • 16 08 2012
  • 21.  Stew (09:04:19) :

    I know but I’m saying at the time I wasn’t into it, now i am

  • 16 08 2012
  • 22.  jonnas (09:52:05) :

    I have to call BS on #1
    I know for a fact that Miley was a mess during those disney tapings and just that fact that u know her means nothing because seeing her once is no measuring of how truly messed up she is.

    im not talking sex and orgys messed up but she was already redneck-y even back then

    the thing is that we have only started seeing it in the past few years with the tattoos and shit but that is the way she has been for a long time

    and I do know for a fact that she was fucking that model she dated and she was under age and her parents were totally cool with it bc she would go on trips to sfco or northen california just with him so they knew and were supportive

    there’s a rumour going around that he was in fact gay and was seen to be fond of another gentleman in the design industry but that was never proven and i dont know for sure to say yes or no but that wouldnt surprise me either there are A LOT of closeted individuals in hollywood and about half of them are bi

    some are the biggest names in show and others just middle of the road sitcom stars or “producers” as they all appear to be nowadays

    sadly, even though lesbianisms dates back to the birth of hollywood and major starlets, in comparisson is the men that take the gold medal when it comes to swingind for both teams as there are a considerable more number of closeted gays and bisexuals males than there are bi women (though a lot more lesbians but the industry is less forgiving of prime of their life lesbian actresses with very few examples of them making it like ellen).

  • 16 08 2012
  • 23.  hierro (11:40:41) :

    nah cool story bro but miley going dowon on someone and bily ray fucking his daughter is too far out there even for a fantasy site let alone these

  • 17 08 2012
  • 24.  flyboy (00:57:43) :

    BS levels are off the chart. He lasts a whole 30 mins? Yeah, right.

  • 17 08 2012
  • 25.  the block obama (08:13:58) :

    if the site is going to go stagnant again,

    please,

    PLEASE,

    dont let this be the post we all see everytime we check back in. Fucking post anything. carly rae jepsen nude scandal for gods sake, anything

  • 17 08 2012
  • 26.  Serpensortia! (14:59:27) :

    and all the fan boys say heyyy hoooo!

    Serpensortia!

  • 17 08 2012
  • 27.  cobalt (20:29:22) :

    #25: this.

    Olivia Munn topless in Magic Mike maybe? The only time she has ever been legitimately fappable, and Justin passes her over for 7th grade Smiley smut.

  • 18 08 2012
  • 28.  evil monkey (00:43:04) :

    This story has convinced me. I’m going back to school and taking the “Lucrative Movie Producer” course. I’m sure as soon as I do this someone will beg me to produce a script that will happen to be with the Disney Channel. Oh, and then I’m sure casting will lead to a former music star forcing his daughter to suck me off. Because that’s how the world works.

  • 18 08 2012
  • 29.  saolts (16:07:49) :

    me too im def going to movie making school so i can get a bj from an underage disney starlet

  • 18 08 2012
  • 30.  harrykrishna (16:53:45) :

    # 26: that is the gayest name I have ever seen…..did you come up with it all by yourself? I hope not..sepensortia,,gaaaayy

  • 18 08 2012
  • 31.  evil monkey (22:15:23) :

    Oh, and of course all auditions for minors are held one on one, in rooms with beds.

  • 19 08 2012
  • 32.  roscoe (16:59:07) :

    Needs more Bella Thorne.

  • 19 08 2012
  • 33.  Ryu (17:14:19) :

    “Oh, right, I’m late to the party, but there is a video of Miley’s audition on YouTube that shows enough of it to call this bull shit. I dunno where the video is, I saw it a while back because I always have to see an audition tape if I come across it. I’m pretty sure she didn’t even audition for Hannah originally. I find it curious why people really seem to want to believe that young girls are being raped.”

  • 19 08 2012
  • 34.  Ken (18:18:39) :

    “I also find it curious,” said Ken, but with an American accent.

  • 19 08 2012
  • 35.  Stu (18:50:30) :

    nah auditions are never just between 2 people when it involves minors.
    usually the agent or parent/guardian is present and if the minor is female there is always another female in the room regardless of association to the minor.
    I worked as a PA for 6 months early this year and that was the norm when they were auditioning, I did not get to see much of the audition process because my involvement was really more in production but any time I was at the offices I got a chance to see many people audition, some minors

  • 19 08 2012
  • 36.  Kingpin (22:07:34) :

    #32 is my hero

  • 20 08 2012
  • 37.  glitter (08:35:52) :

    sorry Stu, your argument DOES have some merit, however as early as “this year” doesn’t bust this story. I mean, think about it. As soon as these guys started shooting their mouths off on the body building forums about what was REALLY going on in the auditions is when I bet the kind of standards you experienced were put into practice.

    And to think, WE ALL could have gone back to school to be television / movie producers and gone right to work for a top tier network and face fucked pre-teen talent. BUT NOOOOOOOOOO, a couple of fucking juice heads gotta ruin it for everyone.

  • 20 08 2012
  • 38.  Stu (12:20:40) :

    @37
    yah you are right I can only speak from my experience and who knows how things were done in the past and there must be some audition process here and there that does end up in bj or fuk sessions I just wasn’t lucky enough to witness one or know of one where I worked

  • 20 08 2012
    20 08 2012
  • 40.  coolstream (23:39:16) :

    5 days late and 2 nipples short of a picture worth caring about… :P

  • 21 08 2012
  • 41.  UPc (09:01:01) :

    the one that i want to see nekkid and u know as soon as she hits 18 she will do it, is the 17yo inside the 40yo body, courtney stoddard
    i just want to see how messed up that is

  • 21 08 2012
  • 42.  Pirho (11:11:32) :

    When did she go blonde? And chop off her hair? She looks fucking retarded.

  • 21 08 2012
  • 43.  UPc (11:34:12) :

    she did it about a week or week and a half ago
    liam must be digging the new do as it is reported that the neighbors heard loud “grunting like noises” coming from their house
    miley must be getting it extra hard now that she looks like a fucking velociraptor

  • 21 08 2012
  • 44.  Pirho (18:07:28) :

    Ha ha velociraptor!

  • 21 08 2012
  • 45.  Wulf (20:35:36) :

    Avril is getting married to the guy from Nickelback…does anyone on here still care about her?

  • 21 08 2012
  • 46.  Stu (21:02:33) :

    Yes Avril is still strong with the force in my pants. Recently this little thing from modern family has been doing it for me since I see her about once a week now on the set sometimes

  • 21 08 2012
  • 47.  harrykrishna (21:59:56) :

    Stu, no one gives a shit about whatever “Involvement” you had ” On the set”.
    Big deal… you are obviously a nobody..it’s like you are name dropping or something.. like any of us here are going to say, “Ooh,wow, Stu saw Miley at her Hannah Montana set!!”….WHO CARES….I doubt you were ever anywhere near anything like you state, but again ..big yawn…even if you were.

    And of course we are all supposed to be jealous of your (I’m rolling my eyes as I type this) on the set viewing of..oh that’s right you didn’t mention her name ( of course) a certain actress on the Modern Family set now…BULLSHIT on it all Stuie..I don’t believe it for a second… so sorry you are not our hero..

    Oh and by the way…is it Stu or Stew? At least get that straight asshole..
    You fucked up ..Mr Transparent,phony ,name dropper

  • 22 08 2012
  • 48.  Stu (01:19:14) :

    lol @

  • 22 08 2012
  • 49.  al (06:49:50) :

    47…yeah I agree …what a poser loser..he never saw these celebs or was on any set

  • 22 08 2012
  • 50.  britbrit (11:44:56) :

    leave britney alone! leave her alone!

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