Do not pass Go, pay the city of Orlando 270 dollars.

Happy Halloween, boys and girls.

In other news: Jam Master Jay from Run-DMC shot and killed in his recording studio. (Link from Yahoo!News.)

Edited because I don’t feel like making a new post to go overtop this one:

On my way home from Cooca Beach this morning, I got a speeding ticket. Speeding in a school zone, no less. At 8:30 in the morning. By a motorcycle cop who, no lie, was a dead ringer for the bumbling cop in Magnolia with the cokehead girlfriend.

…I’m really, really upset, and significantly poorer, once I send the bastards a check, but I realized as I was driving (slowly) away that all things considered, I really did deserve to get it. I’ve gotten out of so much shit, so many stops and traffic violations, and even a hit-and-run (technically, that’s what it was; I hit a Sears truck and tried to dip city–he caught up with me and we gained the attention of an idle police officer a few miles down the road) …all because, in the county I grew up in, my father is a detective with the Sheriff’s department, and my brother in law is also an officer. My grandfather was Highway Patrol, and that helped too. I guess living several counties away, now, it all just finally caught up with me.


39 thoughts on “Do not pass Go, pay the city of Orlando 270 dollars.

  1. was that supposed to be funny thessy James?

    #1 | Comment by ringpinger — October 31, 2002 @ 7:27 am

  2. hurts a bit but i’m fine,i dunnoe wtf happened to muh head but i see the light thoz..and there are biatches with wings there…whhheeee~~~~:)

    #2 | Comment by jam master jay — October 31, 2002 @ 8:19 am

  3. …Funny? People dying isn’t exactly something I’d try to make a joke over. So no. It wasn’t supposed to be funny. Don’t be a jackass.

    #3 | Comment by thess — October 31, 2002 @ 10:52 am

  4. Thess.. i hate to be a burden about this.. but at badassmofo, do i have to pay the 7 bucks to find passwords and stuff?

    #4 | Comment by EverSnow — October 31, 2002 @ 11:03 am

  5. Well, yeah. :\ New members do. A year or so ago, we didn’t. Kinda like how SA started doing with their forums, I guess.

    #5 | Comment by thess — October 31, 2002 @ 11:05 am

  6. That sucks donkey balls. Run-DMC was kickass. 🙁


    #6 | Comment by Bubba — October 31, 2002 @ 11:46 am

  7. Thess….my poor poor girl. I must teach you the ways of getting out of and reducing your speeding tickets.

    First, if this is your first ticket ever, schedule a court date and go please "No Contest". Usually the judge will look at the fact that you have never had a ticket, slap you with $65 court costs and send you on your way with a warning. This will usually work for your second ticket as well, but you will usually only get the ticket reduced, took mine from $300 down to $150 the second time.

    Wouldn’t try this more then twice unless you are going to go plead "not guilty", which I have never had the guts to do. Some people say you can take a gamble and do this, if the officer does not show up then you get off scott free. If he does and you get found guilty, your penalty goes up.

    Ok, once all of these options are used up, there is still driving school. You can do this 5 times in your life (in Florida at least). I know what you are thinking, boring class…blah. YOU CAN DO IT ONLINE! I did it while I was at work (when I had a real job) and just left it minimized in the background. You can do it in sections. Costs like $25 bucks or something, your ticket cost gets cut in half, and you get no points on your license. If you want the link or more info, email me and let me know, I obviously have experience with these type things.

    #7 | Comment by Jamlink — October 31, 2002 @ 1:39 pm

  8. *grins* That would be a GREAT idea if I hadn’t gotten a ticket for failure to yeild in Brevard 8 months ago. (Again, out-of-county.) Meaning I also can’t go to traffic school, since you can only go once every 12 months.


    Okay, back to cleaning this shithole apartment. Amazing how nasty it can get in the space of a week.

    #8 | Comment by thess — October 31, 2002 @ 3:22 pm

  9. first off, tickets blow..and the coppers who give ’em suck as well. jamlink is right with some of his observations though. after my first ticket (for running a stop sign, which i didn’t do), i pleaded no contest and got it reduced. my second (for speeding) is being handled right now with defensive driving on the internet. the texas rules are different though, we can take it as many times as we want, but only once a year.

    the moral is…become the law so you can be immune.

    that and don’t hit and run.. (sigh)

    #9 | Comment by Chris — October 31, 2002 @ 3:25 pm

  10. It was a SEARS truck, I was 16, and absolutely terrified. Besides, it didn’t even do any damage to HIS vehicle. :\ (Lame excuses, it was probably the most retarded thing I’ve EVER done.)

    #10 | Comment by thess — October 31, 2002 @ 3:26 pm

  11. Thess thess thess… me…that’s nothing…my sister has the best story of all! After dropping off her 3 yr old boy at day care, she was late for work…speeding (20 over) she runs a red light. Happens by chances to hit a police car, who spins, and hits another, repeat process for car hit by cop. Sister’s car: Totaled; Cop’s Car: Totaled; Other two cars: Totaled. My sister: Screaming hysterically thinking she killed someone. No jail time…only ticket for speeding and running red light.

    #11 | Comment by J — October 31, 2002 @ 3:27 pm

  12. too bad DMC got shot (NOT)….looks like there is one less C-rapper on the street!

    #12 | Comment by J — October 31, 2002 @ 3:29 pm

  13. Woah J, dude that shit was foul. Honestly if you don’t appreciate what Jam Master Jay did, don’t even fucking say a word. Anyways your narrowminded ass can just shut the fuck up. I hope when you said, "too bad DMC got shot (NOT)" you were kidding around, and besides the point i hope you wouldn’t even kid around about a person dying. You sick twisted individual, if i knew where you lived, i would kick the shit out of you and stick a Run DMC CD in your fucking ass, you stupid fuck. Even if you don’t appreciate Rap, besides the Nellys and Ja Rules of the world, you have to realize that a lot of rappers, i’d say poets have a lot the say. Listen to Mos Def or Pharoah Monch and then fucking have an opinion, you stupid dumb shit of fucking society. It pisses me off that Thess had the dignity to even mention the death of Jam Master Jay, and then i see everyone posting about her ticket and not even understanding the severity of the death of an icon. Everyday people get tickets and every day people die, but think about it for one fucking second and realize what’s more important. Not to be a plagerizer, but i’d like to qoute Jack Johnson, "A billion people died on the news tonight
    But not so many cried at the terrible sight
    Well mama said
    It’s just make believe
    You can’t believe everything you see" although he’s making a point, he’s making a good fucking point, and this shit wasn’t make belief, people do die and if fuckers like you don’t acknowledge the severity of such things, the world would consist of dumb shits, which have no emotions which would coinside with fucks like you. Regardless if you even know who Jam Master Jay was and the pioneer status that followed him, don’t fucking say shit, and just keep your mouth shut.

    #13 | Comment by Kanibus — November 1, 2002 @ 5:37 am

  14. who cares? JMJ was cool, but was he no better than you or I? No. He’s just another mother fucker. People die every day, don’t let the fact that he’s a "celebrity" make you care for him more. Care about your family, care about your friends. He would not have given a shit if you died.

    Also, ‘Kanibus’, saying that you’re going to kick someone’s ass because of what they said to you online ROOLZ DOOD!!@

    #14 | Comment by M@ — November 1, 2002 @ 6:09 am

  15. If you answer flaming with flaming, are you any better than the other flamer ? (I’m not trying to be holy, I do it myself all the time.) Hard question. What is flaming ?
    Any comment saying: fuck, shit, asshole or that kinda thing ? Can’t be; Justin proved that swearing isn’t that bad.
    A comment saying something negative about somebody ? Would it be flaming to write: "Christina Ag???era is a whore !" ? Not really. Would it be flaming to write "Eve/Kelli\Suzi/Meg… is a whore !" Yes it would. So when you’re flaming about celebs, it’s not flaming.
    Is all flaming equally bad ? For example is: "fuck u!!! ure a loser!" worse than: "You write bad, you’re neither funny nor clever."
    to be continued…
    (I hate it when they write that. If it whas shit, I’m like: "Oh no there’ll be more of it!" If it was good: "Fuck! Now I’ll be have to wait a whole week!"

    #15 | Comment by Kingolf — November 1, 2002 @ 9:38 am

  16. Btw, who made that "personal information" thing ?

    #16 | Comment by Kingolf — November 1, 2002 @ 9:40 am

  17. Hey Kanibus…I live in Kalamazoo Michigan…get that far and i’ll even meet you where you want so you can attempt….emphasis on attempt…to do the shit you said. 😉 I could care less about your precious icon…he wasn’t one to me…just another rapper. There are a million out there and their growing everyday. One down? Too bad. Their are 25 already lined up to take his place. One week from now nobody will even be talking about JMJ. And by the way…learn to use a little bit broader of a vocabulary. The word ‘fuck’ only goes so far before making you look retarded. Sorry….. 🙁

    #17 | Comment by J — November 1, 2002 @ 9:54 am

  18. all of you are friggin idiots…blehz!

    #18 | Comment by jam master bater — November 1, 2002 @ 10:20 am

  19. Was Jam Master Jay better than any of us? YES!!! Did any of us ever accomplish what he did? All of us put together? I don’t really think so………….maybe Ben Affleck, but he’s not cool like Jam Master Jay. Take Kurt Cobain for example. Nirvana changed the sound of music in the 90’s, Run DMC in the 80’s, Elvis in 50/60’s. So M@, are you trying to say that JMJ, Kurt Cobain, Elvis, etc. don’t deserve more sympathy/respect than the average person that dies? I don’t disagree with family and friends being the most important part in anybody’s life, but as far as Jam Master Jay being "just another mother fucker." That’s insane. Now if you don’t like rap, that’s fine. I don’t like Eminem, but I realize he’s made a big difference in the rap industry. You can dislike something but still have respect for it, but M@ is just wrong. You are wrong! Look what you made me do!

    AAAaaaarrrrrrr! Run DMC!!!

    This speech is my recital, I think it’s very vital. To rock a rhyme that’s right on time It’s Tricky is the tital, here we go…

    It’s Tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme that’s right on time It’s Tricky…it’s Tricky (Tricky) Tricky (Tricky)

    It’s Tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme that’s right on time It’s Tricky…Tr-tr-tr-tricky(Tricky)Trrrrrrrrrrricky

    #19 | Comment by Bubba — November 1, 2002 @ 10:26 am

  20. kannibus,can you shove your run dmc cd up my ass instead?see,i’ve this medical condition known as piles and i dont haf nuff $$$ to go to tha docs to get my piles shiatz stapled to my anal walls…i bet ur run dmc cd can do the trick…so..J.Dude and Kanibus…if both of u are really serious abt meetin up and settling scores and do emphasis shiats..then drop me an email..cuz maybe we all can benefit from this,J.Dude get to meet you,you get to do ur emphasis plus shove your cd up someone’s ass and i’ll be cured of tha horrible piles which makes me suffer everytime i sit down on my mr sybian.thank you and may the highest lord ganesh bless all of you good good people who’ve taken time to read this humble lil post of mine.from the botton of my loose-stank-pile-ridden-retractable butthole,i love all of you.amen.

    #20 | Comment by dick kok — November 1, 2002 @ 10:27 am

  21. Everything was going great. We had young women posting porn for us, we had funny car accident stories, and then…. idiots flaming each other about a murdered celeb. *yawn*

    Bangbus passwords, anyone?

    #21 | Comment by RedEye — November 1, 2002 @ 10:36 am

  22. I got your Bungbus passwords swingin.

    #22 | Comment by Bubba — November 1, 2002 @ 10:55 am

  23. I don’t seem to have any Bangbus passwords though.

    #23 | Comment by Bubba — November 1, 2002 @ 10:55 am

  24. Last night (haloween) my friends and I used up 160 eggs on our small 2000 person campus. I hit a jeep that tried to follow me so I "dipped" as you say, and then turned around and parked and turned my lights off waiting for him.

    I was too drunk to park in one spot, so he saw me, and pulled in front of me to stop me. I turned the car on, busted to the left, the 3 other guys in the car nailed the jeep, and I sped down a hill and into some side roads…but I think the jeep knows me. Whatever, the green beast takes no prisoners.

    #24 | Comment by cornhole — November 1, 2002 @ 11:22 am

  25. 2Pac still lives!

    #25 | Comment by Jamlink — November 1, 2002 @ 11:56 am

  26. This site sucks anus.

    #26 | Comment by Ronald Reagan — November 1, 2002 @ 12:00 pm

  27. Elvis lives!!!

    #27 | Comment by Bubba — November 1, 2002 @ 12:15 pm

  28. -Kanibus

    I understand what you’re saying, but just because Thess mentioned Jam Master Jay’s death shouldn’t mean that we have to post about how sorry we are about it. That sorta takes sincerity away fron the thought to me. I think each person (if they choose to) should honor him in their own way. I, for example, did the bizarre internet "moment of silence" sort of thing where I waited a day to post…but, what do I know? I’m just a stupid freshman!

    #28 | Comment by Peter the Freshman — November 1, 2002 @ 12:31 pm

  29. I feel your pain Thess… I also come from a family of Law Enforcement agents. The only real problem is I cant smoke in the house…

    #29 | Comment by Celius_Quin — November 1, 2002 @ 1:50 pm

  30. To Everyone, Sorry about my anger post late late last night, I got home from a night of drinking and if you noticed what time i posted, it was early this morning. Anyways, i get home i surf the net for a minute, and i check Fubar one of my favorite sites, and then i noticed the post by J, and it just set me off. I usually don’t post anger posts of any sort, but it just pisses me off when people have no remorse for the dead. Someone mentioned earlier that he wouldn’t have given a shit if i died, true, but i’m also not one of the pioneers of rap. But to wrap things up, sorry again for the personal attack on J, the alcohol distorted my sincerity toward Jam Master Jay’s death and made me mad instead. LAter

    #30 | Comment by Kanibus — November 1, 2002 @ 3:44 pm

  31. I’m a driving statistic. 15 driving without license, didn’t get caught. 16 got a 15 over (when it was 33) for speeding to my minimum wage job that lasted 3 weeks due to construction and being late everyday. I rear-ended someone in my own driveway at night while drinking. At 17 I slept one hour and went down a one-way and hit a shining expensive car. The man with the suit was not pleased. I don’t know whether it’s because I’m female and can’t drive and am a stereotype or I just really had some bad luck. Sorry about your ticket Thess, that sucks. What’s worse is that you’ll pay a long, long time with higher insurance, and that .. well, it sucks. =/

    #31 | Comment by eve — November 1, 2002 @ 4:10 pm

  32. And I knocked off my passenger side mirror when I was 16 and a block away from my house. It was a mailbox and a bad curve with ice. My car was trashed when I was done with it.

    #32 | Comment by eve — November 1, 2002 @ 4:11 pm

  33. Wow, Eve. You’re a menace2society!

    #33 | Comment by RedEye — November 1, 2002 @ 4:28 pm

  34. BTW eve, this photo…teh shexay!

    #34 | Comment by RedEye — November 1, 2002 @ 4:34 pm

  35. Impressive.

    #35 | Comment by Kingolf — November 1, 2002 @ 5:10 pm

  36. I didn’t want to do this…

    1. 16 years old, hit a Sears truck, hit-and-run. Got a "failure to yeild" ticket.
    2. 16 years old, rear-ended a red Astrovan. Insurance now hates me. No ticket
    3. 17 years old, backed into the rear end of a 2002 VW Jetta. The custom-painted bumper was none too happy. Paid them cash for the repair. No police called.
    4. 19 years old, rear ended a dualie dump-bed pickup truck. Driver informed me that since his lisence had been revoked for a DUI, we should both just go on our merry ways.

    I’ve also hit a garage door, one of the columns outside of a friend’s house, a dumpster, and a cat.

    I felt really, really bad about the cat.

    #36 | Comment by thess — November 1, 2002 @ 5:22 pm

  37. why couldn’t helen keller drive? She was a woman

    #37 | Comment by fnfx2 — November 2, 2002 @ 6:17 am

  38. Thess – nice driving record, heh. Mine is comparable.
    1) 15, no license, rehit hit dog in road at 2 am, broken light, insurance covered it
    2) 16, speeding ticket for 15 over (it was 33)
    3) 16-17 landed in ditch/hit fence more than 10 times in really, really bad michigan weather in the country
    4) 16, backed into parked car in my driveway at night at my party, no damage (i hope)
    5) 16, broke off my passenger side mirror on curve at night in winter
    6) 17, backed into guy at intersection while getting out of way of pedestrians, no damage, no cops 😉
    7) 17, wrong way down one way, hit car at intersection, my car and insurance suffered greatly

    besides that, my car was towed twice for running out of gas – my indicator was disfunctional. i was coming back from FL @ 4am, broke down just as the freeway ended, and once a block away from the gas station.

    the worst thing was parking in my mom’s ghetto apartment building parking lot – i had JUST moved in, and 3 days later an 18", 1/4" thick scratch was along my back panels/trunk area. It looked like a ghetto truck door had slid right along my car.

    Most of the time I didn’t have power steering, because no one was kind enough to tell a 16 year old girl that "power steering fluid" existed. A year later I could change my own oil and check fluids, jump start my car (my starter died for about a month), and do minor repairs on my own. (the wonder of having a boyfriend who’s hobby is working with cars)

    My corsica value when purchased used: $2700
    Damages and Upkeep: $1000

    End Result: family drama ensues while my uncle borrows my car after I move to Germany, his friend’s wife’s exhusband totals my car on purpose, while his kids and my uncle were in the car. We received $1300 from the guy after going to court.

    All in all, my car was a royal POS after I was done with it. =)

    #38 | Comment by eve — November 2, 2002 @ 8:38 am

  39. really though… really this has to prove that female drivers are so the devil >8/

    #39 | Comment by Chris — November 2, 2002 @ 12:27 pm

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