rock, starz…

My future husband:

The love of my life. The man who sees into my soul. The HOTT! piece of ass and pretty face that he is…

got arrested.

It’s true – MTV says so.

Shady, Howie… very shady.

For those of you too lazy to read the story… Howie was arrested last week after one of his concerts. A few women joined him on his bus, in normal afterparty party fashion, when things went horribly wrong. One of the girls refused his sexual advances and he apparently locked her in the bathroom. When one of the other girls tried to call the police, he then grabbed her phone and broke it.

He has been charged with two misdemeanors. Criminal property damage and disorderly conduct.

Gentlemen, explain this to me. You are a rock star. A pretty rock star. YouÃ’ve been touring for YEARS as a low-key, drunk, high, acoustic GOD among peons. You hit it big. MTV starts sweating your balls. You release a new album with a full band. You go back and tour all the places you used to play as an opener as the MAIN ATTRACTION and THEN join up with BNL. You are 23 years old. At the top of your game.

Why on earth would you feel the need to try and force some silly groupie into fooling around with you?


I mean… LOOK at that profile! What a jaw line… and those tense neck muscles. mmmn.

Statement from Howie

I’m sure most of you by now have heard about my arrest in Madison on Wednesday night. I’d like to apologize to everyone involved in this unfortunate incident.

Basically, a few people were on my tour bus after the show and things got a little out of hand, stupid things were said, feelings were hurt, and a cell phone was damaged. The police were called. Ultimately I was charged with disorderly conduct and damage to property. My lawyer tells me I will be given an opportunity to address these claims at the proper time, and of course I will do so. In any event, I deeply regret anything I said that offended anyone and, of course, I fully intend to pay for the broken phone.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, some wildly inaccurate and sensational stories seem to be circulating. I can assure you that there was never any improper physical contact, nor has any ever been alleged by anyone involved, and nobody was �Locked away in a bathroom�.

I want to apologize to my fans who were bewildered by this whole thing. Most of all, I REALLY am truly sorry to everyone involved in this incident.
Endless apologies.


Of course, snookums, I’m sure all the stories are sensational. just like thos big, green eyes…

Ahem. I mean, baby. You broke her friend’s cell phone? – that isn’t exactly going to up your chances for a threesome.

And more importantly, how does one lock a trailer bathroom from the outside? Isn’t the lock on the inside?

Maybe he had it designed specifically for this purpose?

In closing, I have to agree with Anabelle, a very credible and intelligent source (she’s been getting damp to his songs for over 3 years now), and a poster on his message board in saying, “i don’t care if he drinks beer, uses drugs, runs red lights, maybe treats his fans poorly… whatever. his songs are still catchy and worth listening to.”

Silly Howie. That grin.

Now if only you’d let Justin Timberlake expose your chest for us. Oh yes. Just like that – only s l o w e r . . .

32 thoughts on “rock, starz…


    #1 | Comment by Azrael — April 2, 2004 @ 1:15 am

  2. weak..1st post

    #2 | Comment by jackdaniels — April 2, 2004 @ 1:15 am

  3. damn…just missed it

    #3 | Comment by jackdaniels — April 2, 2004 @ 1:15 am

  4. I thought this place was about hott chicks, not dudes?!?

    #4 | Comment by Kintrall — April 2, 2004 @ 1:18 am

  5. doesn’t matter….weak or not….i still got it

    #5 | Comment by Azrael — April 2, 2004 @ 1:21 am

  6. Yeah I am wondering about that too. At least show some pictures of hot chicks getting it on with him or pictures of yourself nekkid so he might see them and want you. But anyways what kind of chick are you if you go to a rock star’s room and not expect to have a wild orgie. Jeeze where is this world going to if a rock star can’t get laid….

    #6 | Comment by Howsurazz — April 2, 2004 @ 1:53 am

  7. That guys a faggot.

    #7 | Comment by HowyHater — April 2, 2004 @ 2:11 am

  8. When I first saw this, I thought Justin was finally coming out…

    #8 | Comment by DarckkorioN — April 2, 2004 @ 2:21 am

  9. what? my future husband? why, that would be colin farrell of course!

    #9 | Comment by Justin — April 2, 2004 @ 2:33 am

  10. and on a heterosexual note, i wish avril lavigne would take advantage of me.

    lock me up in a bathroom anytime baby!

    #10 | Comment by Justin — April 2, 2004 @ 2:35 am


    #11 | Comment by blah blah blah — April 2, 2004 @ 3:12 am

  12. lame you dont even get to see her neked lame

    #12 | Comment by merr — April 2, 2004 @ 3:30 am

  13. another joe where are you and your insightful insults? -… .- -.-. -.- — ..-. ..-.
    .-.-.- welcome back justin and all you fubar kiddies

    #13 | Comment by joe — April 2, 2004 @ 4:32 am

  14. That Howie guy is gay, he told me while we were making love last night.

    He’s quite the lover, really knows how to work his thumbs.

    #14 | Comment by Morgan Booth — April 2, 2004 @ 5:41 am

  15. your future husband likes to enter through backdoors. 😉

    #15 | Comment by ripcord — April 2, 2004 @ 5:44 am

  16. who the hell is Howie Day? Another John Mayer clone?

    #16 | Comment by kromekoran — April 2, 2004 @ 6:52 am

  17. maybe the groupie needed pottie training?

    #17 | Comment by Outlaw Torn — April 2, 2004 @ 7:01 am

  18. Yeah who is this Howie guy, man I long for the GOOD posts about Avril in her underwear, punching mirrors with her butt jiggling.

    Those were the good old days.

    #18 | Comment by Good Old Days — April 2, 2004 @ 7:23 am

  19. howie day has been around for quite a while… mostly on the college circuit. like i said, he is an acoustic guitar player. sings his little heart out. so adorable.

    i figured you all needed a break from good old, heterosexual male content. this place gets dull when you gentlemen run out of things to complain about.

    #19 | Comment by lizzi — April 2, 2004 @ 9:54 am

  20. Howie Day is the pride of Bang-Her(Bangor) Maine

    #20 | Comment by Treesurgeon — April 2, 2004 @ 10:28 am

  21. what the fuck is up with these guy pics, i dont know who the lizzi chick is but i dont think we should have to see pics of here future husband unless she gets naked. that sounds pretty fair to me.

    #21 | Comment by hesey — April 2, 2004 @ 11:20 am

  22. This whole post sucks…this dude is lame….and now i may go kill myself….

    ….can we please discuss something interesting…such as the perfect size and shape of the female areola*

    * forgive my spelling i’m just a stupid dope.

    #22 | Comment by Dope — April 2, 2004 @ 11:39 am

  23. Who the hell is that guy and why isn’t he dead?

    #23 | Comment by bligityblah — April 2, 2004 @ 12:20 pm

  24. Yes, a beautiful specimen of man.


    #24 | Comment by Amy — April 2, 2004 @ 4:53 pm

  25. "i figured you all needed a break from good old, heterosexual male content. this place gets dull when you gentlemen run out of things to complain about.

    Posted by lizzi – 9:54am April 2, 2004"

    Justin posting about Titanic is not "heterosexual male content"

    #25 | Comment by DarckkorioN — April 2, 2004 @ 6:12 pm

  26. hey don’t knock teh titanic!

    #26 | Comment by Justin — April 2, 2004 @ 6:38 pm

  27. lizzi, lets start a f.u.b.a.r for females, seriously! i could use hours of staring at pictures of gorgeous naked men and then bitching about them in the comments section.

    and justin, titanic SUCKSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    #27 | Comment by sarah — April 3, 2004 @ 4:39 am

  28. THANK YOU DarckkorioN!!

    #28 | Comment by lsleelee — April 3, 2004 @ 4:39 am

  29. sarah… like i told you before. i’d love to.

    #29 | Comment by lizzi — April 3, 2004 @ 10:48 am

  30. I agree with Sarah on the female fubar idea…

    Talk about masturbatory heaven…this guy is hot! And people joke that he’s gay?!–even better! Two bisexual guys together…I’d love to get in the middle of that. 😉 Man, if I were that girl, I woulda dragged Howie Day into that bathroom with me…sounds like good times…

    #30 | Comment by Becca — April 3, 2004 @ 12:40 pm

  31. what a goddamned hottie.

    Id be the one locking HIM in that bathroom.

    Oh yes.

    #31 | Comment by kinkiekitten — April 4, 2004 @ 10:22 pm

  32. Bender’s gaydar is going off…

    #32 | Comment by Outlaw Torn — April 6, 2004 @ 6:59 am

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