askeet skeet skeet skeet

Got this e-mail the other day. Maybe some of you New Yorkers might be interested?

Subject: hey…
Date: Mon, 8 Mar 2004 23:41:04 EST


Hey — I’m a really big fan of your site. I’ve visited on an almost every weekday basis for the past few years — you and I are actually friends on as well! I tell people about your site and link to it from my own. Please keep up the good work!

Like all Howard Stern fans, I was completely outraged by the past weeks events. On Tuesday, March 16 at 10PM, one of the bands I manage will be giving a special show in honor and support of Howard in New York City. While we know this can probably have no real influence with the right people, we feel it’s important to make our voices heard and hope others will join us in doing the same thing.

I was hoping that you might help us to get the word out. The band is called The Boroughs and are a very popular act in the club scene in NYC (people compare the band to The Violent Femmes and The Ramones). This is a free show, so we will not profit anything by this. We simply hope to have a large gathering of support and protest over what’s happened to Howard. Anything you might do to help us publicize this with your popular site would be greatly appreciated.

Again, keep up the great work with the site.

All the best,

Chris Burkett

The Boroughs
Venue: Luna Lounge
Address:121 Ludlow Street
City: New York, NY
Time: 10 PM

Our temporary website is

I’m sure most of you have heard. Howard’s reign on radio is coming to an end thanks to the F(u)CC(kers). Score one for censorship =(

You know, i actually laughed when i read “you and I are actually friends on as well!“. Hahaha. Friendster. Friendster is so fucking gay. I actually can’t stand Friendster yet i’m a member. It’s stupid.

It’s kind of like my dislike for Hilary Duff. I hate her yet i’d still do her.

Love/Hate relationships are funny that way.

I gotta tell ya,, fucking rules. I love that site. It provides endless amounts of amusement. I find myself just entering random words in there just to see what people think they mean.

Like with friendster:


service where thousands and thousands of people get together to collectivly kiss each other’s ass and gush about how great they are

i may be lonely now, but on friendster i have 708934 friends!!!!!!!

Or Xbox:


One fat-ass doorstop.

XBox? Mo like FRIDGE BOX!

Or SOCOM 2. Which i happen to play all the time.


An Playstation Online game that is good to play with friends. Is fun when you aren’t in a room with homo’s who are concerned about rank and don’t want to be TK’d. Third best birth control device behind the pill and Everquest.

I own you in some fucking Socom.

Hell, there’s even a definition for Keli in there!


an amazingly hott, sexy, funny, weird, cool, nice, sweet, outragous,lovable, considerable, extrordinary, rare, fantastic, most perfectest girl in the world!!!!!

wow look at that keli, wat a piece of art work!

Keli the girl! Keli the definitions!

They’re so true. <3 Keli.

Anyhow, it’s about time i posted up all the voicemail messages i’ve gotten so far.



Two more.


Two more.

38 thoughts on “askeet skeet skeet skeet

  1. #1 baby!

    #1 | Comment by cronox2 — March 10, 2004 @ 3:49 am

  2. Awwwwwww…silly Keli, how sweet!

    #2 | Comment by pangwinking — March 10, 2004 @ 4:00 am

  3. Once again justin you say that you would do hilary duff, almost like you actually have a shot to. I’m sure if she runs across this site your mention of wanting to "do her" it will get her panties nice and wet for you.

    Oh and just cause I think it’ll be handy information, how do you hump a voice?

    #3 | Comment by Jimmah — March 10, 2004 @ 4:15 am

  4. …an imagination is a good thing to have.

    #4 | Comment by jobe — March 10, 2004 @ 4:26 am

  5. you just had to go and pick a really crappy picture. ass

    #5 | Comment by Keli — March 10, 2004 @ 5:00 am

  6. Don’t you like it when attractive young women (Keli) pretend like it’s possible to TAKE a bad picture? I mean come on. You know you’re hot, don’t pretend like you can be ugly. The picture isn’t even bad. Send me one where you’re hideous, and we’ll talk.

    #6 | Comment by radish01001 — March 10, 2004 @ 5:11 am

  7. Justin, those voicemails are yet another batch of weird and uncreative bullplop. Except for that Janeane call (that was great). The song one wasn’t bad either. And nobody can say bad things about the calls from the ladies. But all the rest (except maybe for that vagina recording) are boring and uninspired. If that voicemail is still up tomorrow, I’m gonna call and show all you people what a voicemail message SHOULD be like. Not because I want to, but because I HAVE to.

    #7 | Comment by cf — March 10, 2004 @ 5:15 am

  8. cf…I love you!

    I said the same thing to Justin on AIM…Those VM’s sucked ass.

    #8 | Comment by pangwinking — March 10, 2004 @ 6:05 am

  9. Wow!! Now Keli is famous like Justin. Fucking internet celebs….

    Oh, speaking of Howard Stern, Cat Schwartz was on this morning. I think she showed Howard her boobies. She’s bi-sexual too. Told some girly sex stories. She’s dating some dude now. Why are all the hot bi-girls taken?!?!

    #9 | Comment by grud — March 10, 2004 @ 10:35 am

  10. Wow, who was number seven?! Yowza!

    (tee hee)

    #10 | Comment by thefelinepunk — March 10, 2004 @ 10:41 am

  11. Oh yeah, by the way, QUICKTIME SUCKS!

    #11 | Comment by thefelinepunk — March 10, 2004 @ 10:46 am

  12. I personally like the #6 vm. BTiLC – yay! #4 kicked ass too… Who is this Janine chick… she sounds super hottsex.

    #12 | Comment by embus — March 10, 2004 @ 11:45 am

  13. hehe I liked gunbound on urbandictionary

    very cute azn game ^_^

    (shoots) O SRY.
    teammate: FUK U

    #13 | Comment by WP_LeGeNd — March 10, 2004 @ 11:59 am

  14. Omg justin just seen all your posts on urban dictionary… you have way to much time on your hands!

    #14 | Comment by WP_LeGeNd — March 10, 2004 @ 12:14 pm

  15. "I personally like the #6 vm. BTiLC – yay! #4 kicked ass too… Who is this Janine chick… she sounds super hottsex.

    Posted by embus – 11:45am March 10, 2004"


    By the way, Keli would never say "k thnx"…that’s too gay….like you. Stupid Chinese boy.

    #15 | Comment by Bubba — March 10, 2004 @ 12:31 pm

  16. stfu bubba!

    #16 | Comment by Justin — March 10, 2004 @ 1:08 pm

  17. haha i didn’t expect mine to get posted. Damn i should have been more clear.

    #17 | Comment by Clay — March 10, 2004 @ 1:36 pm

  18. OMG. It was like 1AM and you were pressuring me. My creative energy was shot. Damnit, justin. I told you that one was sent in ERROR. Garrr. I think if you listen carefully, you can hear my sister laughing in the background. She’s like, "Why don’t you just do your normal voice. Justin likes Hilary Duff, right?"

    #18 | Comment by stacia — March 10, 2004 @ 3:32 pm

  19. cf.

    call in with your inspired shit. either I’ll tear you a new bunghole, or I’ll publically apologize.

    Until then, you’re a douche.

    #19 | Comment by xrzdwezl — March 10, 2004 @ 4:04 pm

  20. funny messages vs. staring at Keli…..hmmmm….thanks but no thanks,

    …think i’ll go back to Keli.

    #20 | Comment by Dope — March 10, 2004 @ 4:30 pm

  21. speaking of staring at hot girls….and girls in general…and discussing such topics as, ‘The best angle to insert your penis into a moist vagina’ …..what happened to the content on this site???

    …i mean, Hillary Duff?!?!?! C’Mon!

    #21 | Comment by Dope — March 10, 2004 @ 4:34 pm

  22. Oh no!

    Everybody is talking about Keli…you guys better stop, we don’t want Bubbles to show his mexican rage!

    #22 | Comment by pangwinking — March 10, 2004 @ 4:37 pm

  23. OMG STFU!!!!


    #23 | Comment by embus — March 10, 2004 @ 5:24 pm



    #24 | Comment by Clay — March 10, 2004 @ 6:25 pm

  25. just added two new VMs

    #25 | Comment by Justin — March 10, 2004 @ 7:46 pm

  26. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

    You guys should call in as somebody else besides me nest time, I’m not cool enough. Idolize somebody else you fucks, like Justin or Bubba.

    #26 | Comment by pangwinking — March 10, 2004 @ 8:06 pm

  27. FUCK! Typos…whatever…leave me alone.

    #27 | Comment by pangwinking — March 10, 2004 @ 8:07 pm

  28. LoL, I like the 10th one.

    #28 | Comment by Clay — March 10, 2004 @ 9:28 pm

  29. ……. I’d mess any1 up in socom 2… My name is Broman (the o with the straight line over it)

    #29 | Comment by Broman — March 10, 2004 @ 9:45 pm

  30. This band is really good. There will be E! cameras there filming for Howard’s show. I’m supposed to flash my tits with another girl…Maybe more, I don’t know. The band pretty much tells me and I do whatever for them. If anyone is there from the site, please say hi to me.

    #30 | Comment by Casey — March 10, 2004 @ 11:52 pm

  31. I sound like a little girl…

    #31 | Comment by thefelinepunk — March 10, 2004 @ 11:57 pm

  32. I hate you guys too.

    #32 | Comment by Bubba — March 11, 2004 @ 1:01 am

    lots of good belluci pics here. that’s if you like belluci nude and humping a guy. if it doesn’t work, sry.

    #33 | Comment by uncle pauly — March 11, 2004 @ 1:48 am

  34. pangwinking: keli was talking to me
    psykotik2k: 😮
    psykotik2k: me too!
    psykotik2k: keli loves us
    pangwinking: YAY!
    pangwinking: now can we hug?
    psykotik2k: no
    pangwinking: damn 🙁

    #34 | Comment by Justin — March 11, 2004 @ 1:54 am

  35. 3 fresh voicemail messages sitting in Justin’s inbox. Yes, it took me 3 voicemails to complete what I wanted to do. It’s cause they only give you a certain amount of time. I hope everyone can take a joke. A relatively mean-spirited joke. If for some reason anybody is offended and wants to hurl insults at me, quite frankly I don’t really give a damn. I hope you all find my messages a bit more entertaining than the usual "Hi Justin, just saying hi. Bye."

    #35 | Comment by cf — March 11, 2004 @ 2:33 am

  36. Ummmmmmm…….Monica

    #36 | Comment by Treesurgeon — March 11, 2004 @ 12:25 pm

  37. Casey…take lots of pictures of this said flashing event, ok? Ok…

    On another note…Keli hates me and Justin!

    pangwinking: talk to Keli…she seems fun…she wont talk to me 🙁
    psykotik2k: she is fun
    psykotik2k: i like keli
    pangwinking: keli hates me
    psykotik2k: like is keli backawards!
    psykotik2k: li ke
    psykotik2k: ke li
    psykotik2k: 😮
    pangwinking: hahaha
    pangwinking: fag
    psykotik2k: keli hates me too
    psykotik2k: keli hates us =(
    pangwinking: yeah 🙁
    pangwinking: how dumb
    psykotik2k: =(
    pangwinking: wanna hug?
    psykotik2k: no
    pangwinking: damn 🙁

    #37 | Comment by pangwinking — March 11, 2004 @ 12:29 pm

  38. My name is Luca.
    I live on the second floor.
    I live upstairs from you.
    And you suck.

    #38 | Comment by the river — March 11, 2004 @ 12:41 pm

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