Went out to buy a coupla VCD’s two nights ago night. Bought:

And in case you can’t read the titles:

• The Musketeer
• Zoolander
• The Glass House
• Don’t Say A Word

I’ve actually just finished watching Zoolander before i started typing out this post. That movie is fucking hilarious. It’s not exactly a laugh a minute but it is ridiculously funny in places. Emphasis on ridiculous. Yeah it’s a dumb movie but it’s meant to be that way. So if you’re ever gonna watch it, watch it with an open mind. Don’t expect to much out of it and you’ll probably even like it. I know i did.

And as stupid a movie as it is though, i gotta give it props for all the celebrity cameos they managed to get in the movie. Seriously, everyone from Fred Durst to Fabio is in it. David Bowie, Natalie Portman, David Duchovny, Sandra Bernhard, Winona Ryder, Billy Zane… shit, i can’t even remember half of them. There’re WAY more cameos in this movie than i’ve ever seen in any other movie.

And the whole Malaysian president thing… that was just the funniest shit! Man, this movie is SO gonna get banned over here! Haha. I wouldn’t be surprised if it already is! And the best part… when Ben Stiller actually speaks Malay at the end of the movie! HAHAHA! Some Malaysians are probably gonna be offended by the less than flattering portrayal of Malaysia (that’s at the beginning of the movie) but i thought it was funny as hell. It’s was NOTHING at all like ANYTHING in Malaysia. In fact it looked more like China really. Haha. Even the president of Malaysia looked Chinese!

And that Ben Stiller speaking Malay.

Man… that’s something i would’ve NEVER thought i’d see happen. Haha!

Hey waitaminute. Does Malaysia even HAVE a president? I know they have Prime Minister… and a King or Sultan or whatever… but a President? Hmm.

Anyway, i also managed to watch The Glass House just before i put on Zoolander. I’d actually seen the VCD on sale for quite a while now. And i never thought too much of it till i downloaded the trailer yesterday. Downloaded practically EVERY trailer that’s on this page and a coupla more from these ones.

Watched the Joy Ride trailer. Noticed Leelee Sobieski. Saw The Glass House’s trailer. Noticed Leelee Sobieski again. Here On Earth… Leelee Sobieski! Remembered Eyes Wide Shut… and hey! Again! Leelee Sobieski! With minimal clothing!

And so i came to the conclusion that Leelee ‘i want her on my lap’ Sobieski is hot. And i went out and bought The Glass House.

Thought it was gonna be a piece of shit movie (because it was never really given any advance hype) but it’s actually pretty decent. And even if it was crap, i’d still watch it just so i could look at Leelee ‘i have a funky name’ Sobieski. She’s hot. Did i mention that?

She’s like a younger hotter version of Helen Hunt. She also kinda reminds me of Jewel. And Renee Zellweger. But that’s stretching it a bit too far.

Closest i’d say is that she looks like a younger hotter version of Helen Hunt.

Did i mention that Leelee Sobieski’s hot?

I took some screenshots off the VCD of her in a two piece bikini. And one of her with clothes on. Not exactly the best looking shots ever but hey, you can’t really expect DVD quality screenshots off of a VCD now can you?

Trust me, she looks better moving than she does in these pics.

Just stare at her boobs and ignore how the pictures make her look fat.

Because she’s not.

She’s hot.

I want her on my lap.

I’ll watch The Musketeer later today. I have the trailer for that too. The Hong Kong choreographed fight scenes look so fucking cool. Reminds me of the old Jackie Chan flicks. Elaborate fights on ladders in warehouse type environs… COOL.

Naked Mena Suvari too.

But it’s PG-13 so don’t get your hopes up if you haven’t already seen the flick. Go watch American Beauty for Suvari boobies.

Don’t Say A Word… i don’t even know why i bought that. I’ve had the trailer on my Mac for a while now. Seems kinda run of the mill. I hope it’s got some good plot twists or something. And i really hope the fight sequences in The Musketeer are as good as the trailer makes em out to be. I’m a bit dubious about The Musketeer. What with is being directed by that hack director Peter Hyams.

I mean geez, how bad was End Of Days??

If anything, i’ll be watching it for the fight sequences. Hong Kong style swordfights in a Three Musketeers movie?

I’m there.