Eva Longoria

I showed Justin the cover of the September 2006 Maxim recently, and he said “yumb” so I figured that’s enough approval to post her pics here for all fubarians to enjoy and discuss.

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Wow, it seems like it was only January of last year that Eva was Maxim’s covergirl. Either they must really like her (she has been #1 in their Hot 100 two years in a row), or Tony Parker is paying them a TON of money. Maybe they are just giving guys what they know guys want? Well, if you believe my good friend Smash, that’s not exactly the case…

According to him, there is a vast conspiracy by Maxim (along with the other “lad mags” like Stuff and FHM) to deny horny boys high-quality celeb booty shots for their fapping pleasure. And after Old broke it down for me by reviewing the various Maxim covers over the years, I must admit that there does seem to be some validity to his theory. I think there were something like 3 or 4 full-on butt shots in over 100 covers, and he says that things aren’t much different on the interior photo layouts. So what is going on here? Is this the policy of the magazine, or are ass-conscious celebs showing up to their shoots with contract riders that declare their posteriors verboten? Or can this ominous trend be distilled down to a simple mathematic equation…

boobs > booty ?

I think there needs to be a full Congressional Committee convened with Senate hearings and the whole nine yards until we get to the bottom (pardon the pun) of this!

ps. I left the tags on these images, I hope Justin doesn’t have a conniption… :O

25 thoughts on “Eva Longoria

  1. Eva’s pretty yummy. Even when she’s caked in makeup.

    #1 | Comment by El Payo — August 22, 2006 @ 4:20 pm

  2. First beyotches!

    Anywho, Eva is absoluetly gorgeous. I was lucky enought to see her and Tony in downtown Austin about a month ago. One of her friends with her that night was hot, I would even dare to say hotter than her.


    #2 | Comment by longhorn — August 22, 2006 @ 4:22 pm

  3. I’m equal opportunity. booty = boobs

    #3 | Comment by A-dog — August 22, 2006 @ 4:59 pm

  4. I love it when dumbasses take pride in being first to post a comment on ONE SINGLE blog entry, ya know like there aren’t a million blog entries a day around the net.

    It’s even better when they’re WRONG about being first… F5 is your friend genius.

    Is Justin gonna comment about those busted Amanda Bynes pics floating around (egotastic + others I’ll bet)?

    HI AngelBaby [smooch]…

    #4 | Comment by BobBobson — August 22, 2006 @ 5:12 pm

  5. Stupid, ugly, dumb fuckin’ cunt. NEXT!!!

    #5 | Comment by YourBlueRoom — August 22, 2006 @ 5:36 pm

  6. Not so hot without a crap load of makeup


    #6 | Comment by Napoleanaa — August 22, 2006 @ 6:06 pm

  7. Hot as hell… I don’t give a damn about what anyone says… I wanna see KB and EL have lezbo sex on my Bathroom floor.

    #7 | Comment by Kaka — August 22, 2006 @ 6:16 pm

  8. It’s true. I broke it down issue by issue … no booty… from the latest issues going all the way back to Vanessa Marcil (Las Vegas) but nothing since then, in any of the mags. Only FHM had lots of Tera Patrick booty and some dumb skank (Anna Benson…famous…for nothing).

    :S Bastards


    #8 | Comment by smash — August 22, 2006 @ 6:50 pm

  9. “my good friend smash”


    #9 | Comment by dex — August 22, 2006 @ 7:16 pm

  10. yumb indeed!

    #10 | Comment by erwin — August 22, 2006 @ 8:49 pm

  11. boobs > ass

    less cellulite on boobs.


    #11 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — August 23, 2006 @ 1:13 am

  12. Ass >>>> Tits


    #12 | Comment by Phife — August 23, 2006 @ 4:08 am

  13. ^^^
    hmm…this looks like it might call for a forum poll.

    #13 | Comment by AngelBaby — August 23, 2006 @ 10:08 am

  14. penis > vagina

    wait… what?

    #14 | Comment by Justin — August 23, 2006 @ 11:14 am

  15. I believe the reason celebs are turning down the ass shots is due to the fact that they believe that people don’t mind boob shots and have seen boobs of all kinds all over the world.

    When you see great breasts, what d you think? (Ohh Nice breasts, would love to hold them! oh gee wow!)

    When you see a nice ass….what do you think? (More like…Dayum, I’d fuk that 8 ways from Sunday!!!)

    Smack it, flip it, rub it down;
    tongue it, finger it, go to town!
    Bend her over & treat her like a whore;
    Cuzz I’d love to nail that tight back door!!

    Wait…did I just rhyme?

    Well maybe it’s just me!

    Ass > Boobs !

    Peace – THOR

    #15 | Comment by THOR — August 23, 2006 @ 1:40 pm

  16. boobs don’t smell, or let one go in your face

    boobs are more fun and can move in more than one direction

    boobs that wobble are hot, ass that wobbles isn’t

    boobs can look great either Keeley sized big or perky small – not true of a fat ass or Nicole Ritchie

    you can rest your head on boobs and take a nap

    you can rest a drink on boobs

    therefore boobs > ass

    ass looks better from a distance

    #16 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — August 23, 2006 @ 2:48 pm

  17. Perhaps I’m the only one, but the allure of Eva has, well, dissipated. Her 15 minutes are outlasting their stay.

    #17 | Comment by Eric W. — August 23, 2006 @ 5:15 pm

  18. booty >>>>>>>>>> boobies

    #18 | Comment by kiko — August 23, 2006 @ 8:14 pm

  19. #18 I agree.

    And so do The Goonies. Pirate booty is better than boobies. You can get more boobies when you’re rich. Arrr.

    #19 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — August 24, 2006 @ 12:45 am

  20. DisconcertedGeorge – you can stick your penis inside boobs…

    #20 | Comment by smash — August 24, 2006 @ 7:27 am

  21. #20 You can stick your penis inside the warm confines of a booty.

    #21 | Comment by kiko — August 24, 2006 @ 10:06 am

  22. Thats actually what I meant…I was being sarcastic about the boobs part.

    I fail at the internets.

    #22 | Comment by smash — August 24, 2006 @ 10:41 am

  23. you can stick your penis insde boobs. Depending on the boobs it works just fine.


    One more point for boobies.

    #23 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — August 24, 2006 @ 2:59 pm

  24. Also, if yur nailing the ass doggie style, you can also rest your drink on her back.

    Punish her if she spills it tho!

    Doms rule!

    #24 | Comment by THOR — August 24, 2006 @ 3:30 pm

  25. #24 if she (or he – got to be fair to all DLTers!) doesn’t spill the drink then you aren’t doing your job.

    #25 | Comment by DisconcertedGeorge — August 24, 2006 @ 4:37 pm

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