Apparently this site is my way of trying to pick up chicks. Please. That must be the understatement of the pre-millennium. Interpret that anyway you want. I hate sluts. Yeah, i’m making no sense. Hey guess what? I’m multiply injured in my mouth.

I stabbed my gum with my toothbrush while i was brushing my teeth (emitting a really painful sounding “Aaaooorrwwggwhhhh!”), i bit my lip today while eating a banana, and somehow i bit the fleshy bottom part of my tongue (where it kinda looks all…ewwwy). So my mouth is like a total pain zone. Whatever a pain zone is i don’t know. I just made that up. The pain zone thing i mean. Everything else is real.