So they gave out these awards last night and lots of beautiful celebs showed up to strut their stuff on the red carpet. I didn’t watch (wtf…hours 3 & 4 of 24 were on!) but I did a quick survey of what the girls had to offer (nothing came close to Scarlett’s faptastic red dress from last year), and here are some of my faves. Interestingly, most of them from the world of TV rather than the silver screen.

Salma Hayek (the girl hopping on one foot behind her is Emilie de Ravin)

Ali Larter (whipped cream plz)

Hayden Panettiere (she looked like a little Greek goddess)

Jennifer Love Hewitt (Comeback Player of the Year award?)

Jessica Biel (best body in Hollywood?)

ps. Don’t worry, cheng…I haven’t forgotten about your Camilla post. 😉

It’s back! Everyone’s favorite intarweb game show! It’s…

NAME! THAT! BUTT!

The prize will be the same as the first time, winnar gets to request the subject of my next pic post.

Okay, everyone clear on the rules? Then let’s play!

Ass #1

Ass #2

First person to get them both wins!

Just when you thought Teh Lohan couldn’t possibly dive any further into the depths of the Skanklantic Ocean, she rents a bathysphere and sets new records. Didn’t this whore just have her appendix cut out?

I don’t even know what to make of these pics. Let’s try to break them down…

Lindsay is running. Down a public street. In a bikini. With a cigarette in her hand.

Okay…I’ve got nothing.

o_O

Simpson nipslips in the ocean? Dumb.

One of the best booties in the celebrity universe in the ocean? Yumb.

Jessica’s recent trip to Miami Beach is reminiscent of one she made to the seashore of Los Cabos in a now-infamous yellow bikini that kept riding up into areas that men around the world dream about.

If you squint your eyes in just the right way (don’t pretend you’re not going to, Justin), you can almost make yourself believe she’s bottomless in some of these shots…

Check out all those horny boys just standing there in the surf, slack-jawed with wondrous awe over the beauty that is Alba, while she acknowledges their worship with a coquettish grin. Those guys will have mental fapping material for weeks. Classic.

So the former Princesses of Pop held New Year’s Eve parties…Xtina’s in NYC and Brit’s in Vegas (that alone should give you some hint of where this is headed). Let’s just say that back when the girls were in their early years of fame, I never would have guessed where things would be today. Who knew “Dirrty” Miss Aguilera would end up being the classier one, all things being relative?

Is Britney trying to quit smoking or something? She’s got that wad of gum in her mouth pretty much everytime I’ve seen her recently. And that dress she got tarted up in, that’s one you’ve gotta shave to wear in public…and I don’t mean your legs.

VERDICT: I’m never getting knocked up.

Happy 17th Birthday, Mackie!

Yeah, yeah…I know…two posts in a row.

Sue me.

And a Fappy New Year!

^_^

Happy 16th Birthday, Joanna Levesque!

Do I spy with my little eye some sweet sixteen sideboob? 😮

Beautiful

adjective

1. having beauty; having qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc.; delighting the senses or mind
2. wonderful; very pleasing or satisfying.

noun

The ideal of beauty.

See also:

alluring

angelic

bewitching

charming

dazzling

enticing

exquisite

foxy

gorgeous

lovely

magnificent

pretty

radiant

stunning

Trachtenbabe

ps. Justin is a gigant poopiehead.

Okay, Britney…for the love of all that is holy…just STOP.

We get it. Just because you pop out two Federline spawn, doesn’t mean you can’t still be ghetto fabulous. Thx for beating us all over the heads with it.

‘Desperation’ is one of the ugliest words in the English language.