Monthly Archives: August 2002

Yay! Boring DVD post.

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26

It was DVD tuesday two days ago. And it’s been quite a while since i last bought any DVD’s. So what does this mean?

New DVD’s of course!

Okay so maybe i did promise myself last month that i wouldn’t buy anymore new DVD’s till at least the middle of August but HOW COULD I RESIST?! So many new releases since i last bought any.

So i got:

  • Speed: 5 Star Collection
  • UHF
  • The Thing: Collector’s Edition
  • The Devil’s Backbone
  • Audition

    I watched Speed for the first time since 1994 yesterday morning. And omg, only now do i realize how BAD the acting is in that movie. I never really noticed that before. Keanu Reeves is SO SO bad in that movie. A wooden plank could probably act better him. Well. In that movie anyway. He’s come a long way since 1994.

    I’ve never seen UHF before (an old 1989 Weird Al Yankovich movie). I’ve read good reviews about the DVD though. And it’s apparently regarded as a comedy classic. So i dunno. It should be good i guess. I’ll watch it someday.

    I’ve never really finished watching the The Thing before. I actually have it on bootleg VCD. Bought it while i was still in Malaysia (before i had a DVD player back then). I never got around to finishing the movie because the second CD was terribly encoded and it keep freezing every 3 seconds making the whole last half of the movie totally unwatchable. So i gave up and decided to wait till i get it on DVD and finish watching the whole thing then. The DVD is pretty packed with extras. Audio commentary, 80 minute documentary, outtakes, deleted stuff, behind the scenes footage, photo galleries etc etc. LOADED. Good stuff. Classic movie too.

    There’s a videogame version of the movie coming out soon that looks pretty promising. I hope it lives up to the hype.

    The Devil’s Backbone should be pretty good. I’ve heard a lot about it. Saw the trailer last year. Looked pretty spooky. Ala The Sixth Sense/The Others. I’ve always liked Guillermo Del Toro’s work. Chronos, Mimic, Blade 2. All pretty good flicks. Blade 2 was awesome. Love it love it love it. So The Devil’s Backbone should be awesome too (i hope). It’s in Spanish though. So for those of you who can’t stand subtitled movies, well… it’s your loss. You’ll be missing out of some really good horror.

    And you might not wanna watch Audition either. Although i’d strongly suggest that you do. I mean come on now, how could you NOT wanna watch Audition after seeing how many great reviews the movie got? Plus it has, quite possibly, one of THE most gruesome torture scenes ever in a movie. So that alone is worth checking it out for. Those wacky Japanese… always making the most fucked up movies/cartoons.

    I wish Battle Royale was on DVD. That’s another really good Japanese movie that i haven’t seen. Oh and Audition is in Japanese too by the way. Which is why you probably might not wanna check it out (“AAHHH SUBTITLES! Fuck it”). Well… again, it’ll be your loss.

    Don’t be a n00b. Watch movies in widescreen. And don’t pass over subtitled movies just because of the subs. And NEVER watch anything dubbed. And none of that Pan and Scan crap either.

    So go rent Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon if you haven’t. And Run Lola Run. And The Princess And The Warrior. All good subtitled movie goodness.

    DVD’s that i’m looking forward to buy:

  • Spider-man
  • Star Wars Ep 2 Attack Of the Clones
  • Blade 2
  • Lord Of The Rings (the 4 disc set. not the lousy 2 disc version. although i’ll probably get both sets anyway just for the sake of the DVD completist in me)

    DVD’S. Mmmmmm.

    This is so cool. Somebody should buy me one.

    • True story

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    14

    Last night i experienced true hell for the first time.

    I was lying in bed. Listening to Jan De Bont’s audio commentary for Speed on DVD which i’d just bought the day before. I couldn’t keep myself awake to finish the whole thing so i turned everything off right after the part where the bus jumps that gap in the freeway. And i proceeded to fall asleep.

    About an hour or so later, i woke up feeling really really sick. It was so bad. I got up, stumbled around in the dark, grabbed a empty cup off my table, walked out of my room and filled it up with water.

    I found a place to sit and i put the cup down on the floor. The pain was just crazy. It was so bad that i actually broke out in a cold sweat. I assumed a ‘crash seating position’ like how you would if you were on a plane that was just about to crash; holding on to my dear life. I felt like i was about to faint. Sitting there. Sweat beading off my forehead. Down my nose. Onto my arm. As i sat there with my head resting right between my knees. And then it happened. It was grotesque. It didn’t feel at all like how it usually would. It was all wet. Moist. Liquidy. Drippy. And the way it all happened was as if it just exploded out of there. And the sound that it made… it was just undescribable. It was sort of like a “Fhlphhooofb… Phfoolb… Phlb..“. Then “Plop… plop plop… plop.”.

    Minutes later… relief. No more pain. No more nausea. And i felt as ease. Calmness.

    So i tore off some tissue paper, reached around behind my back and wiped my ass. Oh and i used the water in the cup to wash off any leftover shit before that.

    Then i got up off the toilet and went back to bed.

    That sure was one satisfying dump.