Random crap

You know what? Thanks to stupid fucking Janet Jackson’s TIT, live radio and tv is going to suck forever. Fucking delayed broadcasts on TV, fucking no more Howard Stern on radio, fucking the END of crazy spontaneous on air stunts thanks to a nipple! It sucks! Live award shows on TV are never going to be the same. They’ll all be TAME and BORING. And even if something DOES happen, you won’t be able to see it anyway! BOOOO.

So i’m really starting to dig Joss Stone. She’s not really drop dead gorgeous or anything but there’s something about her that makes her seem more sexy than she really is. Plus she’s got an amazing voice. I think i like her more for her talent than her looks. She’s been doing the late night talkshow rounds lately and she seems like a really nice girl. Did anyone catch her on Last Call With Carson Daly last night? She was fucking adorable. I’d totally do her… IF SHE WASN’T 16.

(she looks like she’s fucking 20 something. but isn’t. i swear to God, kids these days..)

She British by the way. And speaking of Brits, i always find it completely jarring when i hear British singers speaking. Like during an interview for example. I mean, they all usually sing with an American accent, which is fine, but when they start speaking, you can barely make out what the hell they’re saying half the time. Worst offender: Shirley Manson, from Garbage (okay so she’s Scottish, but she still proves my point).

It’d probably be ridiculous though if she sang all her songs with a Scottish accent. Joss is fine though. Her accent isn’t as thick. I still can’t believe she’s only 16 though.

Watch her do her thing.

To: psykotik@gmail.com
Subject: Intro to nmap – VIDEO
From: “Mike Noonan”
Date: Wed, 25 Feb 2004 20:57:22 -0700

I’m a big fan and thought your site might need a link to this video.

22MB download


Breast physics in videogames have come a long way. This game probably has the most best boobie jiggle i’ve ever seen. It’s a female oriented wrestling game that’s coming out in November.

Let’s see now..

females + breast physics + wrestling = yep i’m definitely buying this

You know, that site that i used to have where i hosted all those bandwidth raping files. It’s over at here now.

Anyhow, i put up two new 13 meg Monica Bellucci mpegs on there. From that Malena movie. You know, the one where some thirteen year old boy gets to fucking undress her and see her completely naked up close and personal. Lucky fucking bastard. Get em while you can because i probably won’t be hosting them forever.

Mmmm… Monica

I’ve said it once before and i’ll say it again: Monica Bellucci is the most gorgeous woman on the face of the earth. Look at her. Damn. And she’s almost like what? 40? (well, she’s actually 39 to be exact).

When i think of the word ‘perfect woman’, Monica Bellucci comes to mind.


(Okay i may be just a little bit biased due to the size of her breasts)

You should watch all these movies

Frankenhooker. Have any of you seen that movie? It’s pretty old (1990) and kinda obscure. Very low budget. Very bad in a good way. I remember renting it on VHS and thinking that it was one of the greatest (bad) horror movies i’d ever seen at the time (until i saw Dead Alive which came out 2 years later). Actually to be honest i only started getting into low budget horror movies after 1993. Right after Army Of Darkness came out. So it probably wasn’t until after 1993 did i get to see both Frankenhooker and Dead Alive. After discovering the man that got me hooked on these types of movies, Sam Raimi.

Just in case you didn’t know, i’m a HUGE Sam Raimi/Bruce Campbell fan. Now, when you think of those two names, the Evil Dead Trilogy probably comes to mind first. Funnily enough, my first introduction to Sam Raimi (type) movies didn’t happen with the Evil Dead ones. It was with Darkman which came out in 1990.

I LOVED Darkman. I LOVED it. I thought that it was like the best movie ever back when it first came out. I must’ve watched that movie like, i-don’t-know-how-many times. I even bought the NES game (it really sucked though. unlike the super cool movie it was based on. it played almost exactly like fucking Robocop 2 which was also another shitty game).

Anyhow, 3 years later, Army Of Darkness came out.

And when i saw “From the director of Darkman” on the cover, my vagina went wet. Not knowing that AOD was actually the third part in a series of movies, and having not seen it’s prequels yet, i immediately went out to search for parts 1 and 2 as soon as i finished watching AOD. And i’ve been a Sam Raimi/Bruce Campbell fan ever since.

It wasn’t long til i started seeking out other cult movies from other cult directors.

Like Peter Jackson’s Dead Alive.

Stuart Gordon’s Re-animator.

And, of course, Frank Henenlotter’s… FRANKENHOOKER!

I don’t think many people have heard of Frankenhooker. It’s basically about this guy who starts making a new girlfriend out of hooker parts after his own girlfriend get’s chopped to pieces after an unfortunate accident with a lawnmower.

I think the only other plot synopsis that can top that is the one from Little Otik…

…about a couple who can’t have a baby, so they dig up this tree stump, diaper it up and decide it’s their baby. Oh, and by the way, the tree-stump baby happens to eat people.

So i figured, okay, Frankenhooker. One of the most memorable movies i’d ever seen. Everybody i’ve ever talked to has never heard of it. So i check online to see if it’d ever been released on DVD. And it has! But it’s out of print. I check Amazon.com but they’re all out of it. So is every other site out there. Although i did see people trying to sell used copies on Amazon for like fucking 50 bucks or so. 50 bucks! Outrageous! So then i check eBay and whaddaya know? It’s listed! Some of them even for under 5 bucks! But then i tried bidding on a copy and i kept getting outbidded. My question is, who the fuck would ever want to buy this movie??? (besides me of course)

I actually don’t have a point to make with this post. I’m just pissed that there are other idiots out there that actually want Frankenhooker on DVD (i don’t blame them though. it’s a great movie). They’re still fuckers though. For denying me to purchase the DVD for under 10 bucks by outbidding me each time. Assholes. I’m not paying more than 10 bucks for that DVD.

I think i’ll just go and buy Dead Heat instead.

Joe Piscopo baby!


To: psykotik@gmail.com
Subject: youthadude!!!
From: “W.Harris”
Date: Sat, 14 Feb 2004 00:09:58 -0500


I just wanted to send you an e-mail letting you know that I’ve been browsing fubar for about two weeks. Since then I’ve come to this conclusion . . . I AM REPULSED!!! Repulsed at the fact that other blogs have tried and failed to match this AWSOME site.

Ever since I’ve viewed your website I’ve;

  • Quit Heroin
  • Delivered 10 babies in 20 minutes
  • Found a cure for the “Pee Shivers”
  • Lost 2.5 pounds
  • Wrote a book called “Feelings: I feel pretty”
  • Found a way to take over Microsoft headquarters using an X-Box
  • And I’m also proud to say that I’m on the road to recovery from what my shrink says is my “compulsive lying disorder” . . . . phhh, WHATEVER!!! Anyway, I just wanted to say please keep up the good work. Besides the free porn, I actually do read the posts which are always funny.

    Yours truly while escaping Neverland Ranch,

    I got this other e-mail today. It’s about this link that this one dude found. It’s kinda old though (maybe about a month now?) but it’s new to me and it’ll probably be new to some of you too.

    To: psykotik@gmail.com
    Subject: Cute Chick Tip
    From: “Edward”
    Date: Tue, 17 Feb 2004 21:07:41 +0100


    pics were ripped from opendir after her boyfriend put them online at a local site, she doesn’t even know. Pics were all over the internet in several days.

    The chick is pretty hot. Sorta reminds me of Stal somewhat. Speaking of whom, where are you Crystal??

    Big and Little

    I totally forgot The Littlest Groom was on tonight. I only managed to catch the last 5 minutes. Crap. Oh well. My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance is on next!


    Okay. Substandard post, i know. So lemme just update this bitch with some pictures i just found of Beyonce Knowles from the All Star halftime show the other night. Hi res!

    Uh oh uh oh uh oh!

    Can you say… an accident waiting to happen?

    Too bad nothing ever did though =(