Isn’t she going out with Nick Lachey now or something?

Me thinks Vanessa Minnillo > Jessica Simpson

Oh for fuck’s sake.

How hard is it for someone to get a clear shot of that damn poster of Winona Ryder in the nude!?!

And OOH. A T-Shirt version?

I’d buy that for a dollar.

Guess where she stores her RAZR.

Holy shit.

Too bad i don’t have a vagina.

I don’t know about you but i think Erika Christensen is pretty banging. Maybe i just have a thing for ‘fat’ chicks. Loved her in Swimfan. I’m pretty sure i fapped to that one scene where she’s in that swimming pool making out with that one dude from Bring It On.

Anyhow, just check out that GLORIOUS GLORIOUS CLEAVAGE* of hers. I want to bury my face in it.

Pictured above with Emmy Rossum. There’s also some other chick in the set that i do not care about.

By the way, Emmy Rossum = Hottest Jew since Natalie Portman**!

*Of course, it’s all really just some fancy trickery involving tight dresses and/or push-up bras. I’d still fap to it.

**Open to debate.

From: John
Date: Sep 14, 2006 10:07 AM
Subject: Kristen Bell IS Princess Leia

Hey Justin. Here’s a shot of Kristen Bell for all the “fanboys”…

Is it just me or have her boobies gotten smaller since we last saw her?

UK:Resistance seems to think she’s aged badly too.

I’d still hit it though.

From: Allen
Date: Sep 13, 2006 3:45 AM
Subject: Lohan is at it again

I’m not sure if you’ve seen this yet Justin but I just had to share, because since Lindsay is apparently really into sharing I have to pay it forward or some such nonsense. Keep up the good work man.

Never… Heard… of her? (ZING!?) Neither have i. But i was reading up on this little indie horror flick called All The Boys Love Mandy Lane (which she plays the title character – sounds like a good movie too) and i was like, YEP, HOT ENOUGH TO GOOGLE. So i did.

Didn’t find out much about her though. Guess she’s not famous enough. But i did find out her vital statistics!

Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Green
Height: 5′ 8″
Bust: 33
Waist: 24
Hips: 33
Dress: 1
Shoe: 8

Proficient in American Sign Language, Spanish 3 student, dancing, horseback, lacrosse, swimming, varsity drama, certified lifeguard, rock climber, diver, and golfing.

Born 22 April 1986.

Wait. Doesn’t that make her like, 20 or something?

Too old.

But i’d still hit it.

So i was watching MTV earlier today and they had this interview with this relatively new chick singer person – new to me at least, never heard of her before. Didn’t find out what her name was until after the interview. She was talking about her musical influences and stuff – 50 Cent, Jay-Z etc etc, and how she’s into hip hop and stuff – even though her music sounds nothing remotely like hip hop – more like Britney Spears really. So anyway, they played her video, my penis contemplated getting a boner, i waited for her name to show up, and there it was. Tata Young. Tata Young??

So anyway, i Google her and tried to see if she had any hot pics online. Because, fuck, that video of hers that played, it was hot. Like, literally. I’m pretty sure she even sang about temperatures rising and how she needs the rain to cool off the (her?) hotness or something.

She actually sort of looks like Jessica Chobot. I think it’s her haircut. I still hate Jessica Chobot by the way.

Askmen.com gave her a pretty decent rating (79/100).

Anyhow, click here to watch that video where she’s writhing around on a bed all wet and touching herself and stuff.

I think i’d hit it.

Oh, excuse the crazy moon language that she speaks in at the beginning of the video. She’s from Thailand.