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Got this e-mail the other day. Maybe some of you New Yorkers might be interested?

——————–
To: psykotik@gmail.com
Subject: hey…
From: Chrisburkett1@aol.com
Date: Mon, 8 Mar 2004 23:41:04 EST

Justin,

Hey — I’m a really big fan of your site. I’ve visited on an almost every weekday basis for the past few years — you and I are actually friends on friendster.com as well! I tell people about your site and link to it from my own. Please keep up the good work!

Like all Howard Stern fans, I was completely outraged by the past weeks events. On Tuesday, March 16 at 10PM, one of the bands I manage will be giving a special show in honor and support of Howard in New York City. While we know this can probably have no real influence with the right people, we feel it’s important to make our voices heard and hope others will join us in doing the same thing.

I was hoping that you might help us to get the word out. The band is called The Boroughs and are a very popular act in the club scene in NYC (people compare the band to The Violent Femmes and The Ramones). This is a free show, so we will not profit anything by this. We simply hope to have a large gathering of support and protest over what’s happened to Howard. Anything you might do to help us publicize this with your popular site would be greatly appreciated.

Again, keep up the great work with the site.

All the best,

Chris Burkett
Manager

The Boroughs
Venue: Luna Lounge
Address:121 Ludlow Street
City: New York, NY
Price: FREE ADMISSION
Time: 10 PM

Our temporary website is www.theboroughs.cjb.net
——————–

I’m sure most of you have heard. Howard’s reign on radio is coming to an end thanks to the F(u)CC(kers). Score one for censorship =(

You know, i actually laughed when i read “you and I are actually friends on friendster.com as well!“. Hahaha. Friendster. Friendster is so fucking gay. I actually can’t stand Friendster yet i’m a member. It’s stupid.

It’s kind of like my dislike for Hilary Duff. I hate her yet i’d still do her.

Love/Hate relationships are funny that way.

I gotta tell ya, UrbanDictionary.com, fucking rules. I love that site. It provides endless amounts of amusement. I find myself just entering random words in there just to see what people think they mean.

Like with friendster:

friendster

service where thousands and thousands of people get together to collectivly kiss each other’s ass and gush about how great they are

i may be lonely now, but on friendster i have 708934 friends!!!!!!!

Or Xbox:

XBox

One fat-ass doorstop.

XBox? Mo like FRIDGE BOX!

Or SOCOM 2. Which i happen to play all the time.

Socom

An Playstation Online game that is good to play with friends. Is fun when you aren’t in a room with homo’s who are concerned about rank and don’t want to be TK’d. Third best birth control device behind the pill and Everquest.

I own you in some fucking Socom.

Hell, there’s even a definition for Keli in there!

keli

an amazingly hott, sexy, funny, weird, cool, nice, sweet, outragous,lovable, considerable, extrordinary, rare, fantastic, most perfectest girl in the world!!!!!

wow look at that keli, wat a piece of art work!

Keli the girl! Keli the definitions!

They’re so true. <3 Keli.

Anyhow, it’s about time i posted up all the voicemail messages i’ve gotten so far.

Fapalicious.

Update:

Two more.

Update:

Two more.

True story

OMG so i was sleeping right, and i was dreaming about Ben Stiller and that wife of his who was in those Brady Bunch movies (and i think in Zoolander too. can’t remember her name but i’d like to see her naked. yup) and then i started getting this horrible horrible pain. Then i was like subconsciously thinking in my dream “omg not again”. So i wake up from my dream and stumble out of my room. The pain started getting worse so i sat down. I started breaking out into a cold sweat and i felt like i was about to pass out and die! But strangely enough, my stupid dream was still going on! So all the while, i had fucking Ben Stiller and his wife running around in my thoughts! So then i’m like, “Fuck you Ben Stiller and your wife! I’m dying here!”. The pain was getting worse so i assumed a crash position and hoped for the worse. I waited and waited and nothing. So i waited some more and i could feel my entire body sweating. I was sweating in places i didn’t even know i could even sweat in. Then it happened. “plonk plonk plonk splosh” And then it happened again a few more times after several intervals. And then the pain subsided. So then i washed my asshole, wiped it up with some TP, flushed the toilet and went back to sleep. The end.

May 28, 2004

Remember when disaster movies used to be all the rage back in 96/97/98? Twister, Volcano, Dante’s Peak, Armageddon, Deep Impact, Independence Day and of course, the grand daddy of them all, the best movie ever made, winner of 11 Academy Awards, the no. 1 top grossing movie of all time with $1,835,400,000 in box office receipts worldwide, TITANIC (1997; dir. James Cameron). Holla!

Well the people who started it all (with ID4) are at it again.

The Day After Tomorrow.

Where will you be?

(Trailer)

Continue reading

Tough love

Stupid camgirls. Don’t you just love them? I do. Especially when they do something stupid. Like ooh say, taking naked pictures of themselves. Pictures that will come back to haunt them and make them think, “I can’t believe i was so fucking STUPID!”. Sure sure, people do stupid things all the time. We’re all human. We make mistakes blah blah blah. Stupid is as stupid does and all that. But naked stupid? That’s probably one of the worst kinds of stupid out there. I’m sure Libby Hoeler knows the feeling.

Continue reading

Fucking Over Pangwinking

Teh Bubba: holy shit, i should write a post about smash. he’s creepy as fuck, and he scared me!
pangwinking: how?
pangwinking: did you touch your bad place?
pangwinking: sigh
Teh Bubba: hohoho, funny you ask! welllll…
pangwinking: i lose again
pangwinking: did HE*
Teh Bubba: shit, this is when the post starts
Teh Bubba: i better start writing it…

Continue reading

Mean Girls

This trailer made me chuckle at least three times. Which is a good thing because it takes a lot to actually get me to chuckle or to laugh out loud during a movie. So bonus points for being able to that. It looks a lot better than Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen and also better than anything Hilary Duff is in (i hate Hilary Duff). By the way, whatever happened to Amanda Bynes? Did she drop off the face of the earth or something?

Lindsay Lohan must be working like crazy these days. This is like what? Already her second movie to come out this year? And it’s barely even March yet.

She’s probably also wearing like 5 pounds of makeup in this movie to cover up all those freckles that she has.

Lindsay looking really hot. Thanks to airbrushing and lots of makeup of course. Damn you fakeness of Hollywood!

Update:

Short clip of Lindsay Lohan’s boobies bouncing around. If you download this, you are a pedophile.

Learn something new everyday

I saw an ad for this product on TV and i had this sudden urge to google it and post about it on my site.

It’s a Vaginal Cleansing Film.

It kinda reminds me of those breath strips. The ones that you stick on your tongue. Hehe. If any of you guys (or gals) feel like getting a free sample just for shits and giggles, you can get some here.

psykotik2k: hey
psykotik2k: whats a douche
the feline punk: what’s a douche?
the feline punk: are you serious?
psykotik2k: whats a douche
the feline punk: you are serious.
the feline punk: okay, well, I personally don’t use one
the feline punk: I don’t know very many women that do
psykotik2k: whats a douche
the feline punk: but it’s a gentle cleanser for vagina.
psykotik2k: ok then whats a douchebag
the feline punk: hang on, I’m going to tell you
the feline punk: okay, it works like this: when you buy a douche at the store (such as say, summer’s eve), it comes prepackaged with the douche in a soft plastic container, with special attachements, all of it disposable
the feline punk: the soft plastic container would be the “douche bag”
the feline punk: you insert the end of the attachement in the vagina, and softly squeeze the bag
the feline punk: this flushes the douche into the vagina, thus cleansing it out
the feline punk: now, I’ve always imagined that someone that might need a douche was quite skanky
the feline punk: but some women use it just because they like a good clean feeling
psykotik2k: girls are so complicated
the feline punk: I honestly don’t know ANY girls that use a douche
the feline punk: Many girls claim that a douche can actually cause yeast infections
the feline punk: but nowadays prepackaged douches are already pH balanced so as not to upset your vagina’s natural pH, and therefore will not cause a yeast infection
psykotik2k: vaginas are so complicated

I’m so ignorant.

Voicemail thingy

Yep. I signed up for a 7 day free trial thing over at uReach.com. It expires next week so if you’re gonna call, do it by then. Here’s the number:

1-877-887-5898

It’s a toll free number. Won’t cost you a dime. As always, i’ll post up all the good voicemail messages once i get any. If none of them are good, none will get posted. Don’t forget to speak loud and clear.

Missed the old voicemail posts? Here they are.