Mmm Carla. Loved her ever since i first saw her in the Academy Award winning Pauly Shore masterpiece, Son in Law. Her boobies have gotten bigger too.

Click

Of particular note is the partial list of women that Razor declares brings us to our knees.

I’ll put a penis next to the ones that would literally bring me down to my knees.

Not too many but that’s just the ones that i really like. The others, not so much. Some, not at all (i’m looking at you Jessica Alba). But in truth, i’d probably bone them all.

What’s Estella Warren doing on there? She is so 2001.

I hate playing Halo 2. It makes my blood boil. Mostly because of all the fucking 10 year old kids that populate Xbox Live with all their fucking smacktalk.

Oh well. At least i have chicken.

Just one (GLORIOUS) pic.

Luke Skywalker? Han Solo? Pffft. Sorely overlooked is the TRUE HERO of the original Star Wars trilogy, Wedge. Yeah, that’s right. Wedge. Wedge Antilles. By his actions and his words, he’s the one person the audience can truly relate to. Why? Well, during the famous climax of Star Wars, he makes some poor excuse and runs away. Who among us can say that, with Darth fucking Vader and half the imperial fleet behind them, they wouldn’t have done the same?

Then, during the final battle in Jedi, Wedge is the first to fly into the bowels of the Death Star. A heroic move? Or just the best way to escape the massive dogfight going on outside? And despite his being in first, how come it’s the Millenium Falcon and not Wedge that’s last out when the reactor blows? Throughout the three films, Wedge keeps his head down, and doesn’t risk his neck. He doesn’t kiss his sister either. My kind of guy.

Wedge in Star Wars. Status: sitting down. He manages to appear in all three films sitting down. From X-Wing to snowspeeder to briefing room to X-Wing again, he’s always polishing a seat with his ass.

Wedge in The Empire Strikes Back. Status: sitting down. Despite looking like he’s constipated, Wedge’s speeder kills one of the two trashed Walkers.

Wedge in Return Of The Jedi. Status: sitting down. Although, maybe he’s standing in the pre-battle briefing. Let me know if this man has legs.

Keeley’s being featured on the Page 3 website again. And just in you missed them, here are yesterday’s shots:

And today’s:

Can’t believe she’s only 18. I never saw any girls like that when i was 18. What the hell are they putting in the water up there in England?

I still like her better au naturel though.

Boobies!

I still want that PacMan hat.

I’m in love with Keeley Hazell (a name that you may or may not have ever heard of). Believe it or not, the first time i saw her, was with her clothes on. Didn’t know who she was but after seeing a picture of her on Simply Gorgeous not too long ago, i was left wishing and hoping and thinking and praying, planning (?) and dreaming that she’s been naked before.

If you do not find her the least bit attractive, then you’re a fag.

Turns out she’s a Page 3 model and not only that, but she also won some Page 3 Idol contest earlier this year. This is all of course pretty old news to all you European folk and most of you yanks reading this probably’ve never even heard of her. Nevertheless, i think she’s pretty. With or without clothes on (i actually like her even more without all that makeup on in the clothed pics because really, that’s what girls would look like without aribrushing, lighting and caked on makeup).

Yep. Nothing like a pretty girl with the additional bonus of having the bestest pair of tittays i’ve ever seen.

Which gets me thinking about the face vs. boobs ‘dilemma’.

Pretty girls with small boobs (Natalie Portman-ish, Keira Knightley-ish)

Average girls with big boobs (Thora Birch-ish, Michelle Horn-ish)

Which would pick over the other? Forget about the all important ‘personality’ factor for now. Me personally, sometimes a pretty face can totally outweigh the lack of boobage. And if that pretty face comes with a great personality, then fuck boobs. She can have a penis for all i care.

Okay maybe not a penis.

Then again boobs are pretty fun to have around though…

Sometimes i wish i had boobs. I’d probably lie in bed all day playing with them forever. Do girls ever do that? Do girls even read this site? The comments section has been quite a sausage fest lately. Come out out and play. Nothing to be afraid of. We’re only just sad lonely men with no lives who’re constantly hoping to get laid. Or maybe i should just speak for myself.

In related news, Keeley’s ex-boyfriend is officially the dumbest person on earth.

This is pink. This is purple. There’s a difference!

On a side note, i need to be on one of Blogebrity’s A, B or C lists. Because i am after all an internet celebrity and therefore one of the most powerful people on the planet. Or at least that’s what i’d like to think on my MySpace profile. Maybe they should have a D list for people like me. Hell, i’ll even take being on the E list because i’m that much of a shameless bastard.

By the way, kudos to Steve Hall and Uncle Grambo for making the A-list!

Update:

Yeah see. I fucking told you this site is purple. What’re you going to say now fags?

(via Trent)

Update

I MADE THE B-LIST.

My new homepage. Now i don’t have to click on my Gmail bookmark ever again. Plus i can get Wired and Slashdot news all on the same page. And i like how you can drag and drop stuff around. Nifty.

Google is slowly taking over the internets.

This post is for all of you who actually give a shit about Star Wars. Personally, this is what i think about Episode II:

Nevertheless, i’ll still watch Episode III for completions sake. I’ll probably just buy it on bootleg DVD when it comes out in the next couple of days or something. Too cheap/lazy to actually go see it at the movies.

So what’s the verdict fanboys? Those of you who’ve seen it. Is it really Titanic in space? Because if it is, then damn! Because as we all know, Titanic is like, the best movie ever. So maybe this is like the best Star Wars movie ever too???

Titanic > Episodes I – VI

I’m serious.